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Thread: Teacher arrested,accused of terrorism

  1. #1
    Inactive Member oldasdirt's Avatar
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    Post

    Teacher Arrested in New York New York, NY

    A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy
    International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in
    possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule and a
    calculator.

    At a morning press conference, Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said
    he
    "believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement."

    He did not identify the man, who was charged by the FBI with
    carrying weapons of math instruction.

    "Al-Gebra is a problem for us," Gonzales said. "They desire
    solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a
    search of absolute value. They use code names like x and y and refer to
    themselves as unknowns but we have determined they belong to a common
    denominator of the
    axis of medieval coordinates in every country. As the Greek
    philanderer Isosceles used to day, There are three sides to every
    triangle."

    When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had
    wanted
    us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us
    more
    fingers and toes."

    White House aides told reporters they could not
    recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President.

  2. #2
    HB Forum Moderator Alex's Avatar
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    Arrow

    Very funny piece.

    If that is yours why not submit it to Opednews.com (they normally want 3 days exclusivity but don't worry about that in this instance.)

  3. #3
    Inactive Member oldasdirt's Avatar
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    Post

    I wish it was mine.

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