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Thread: Cats vs. Dogs

  1. #1
    Inactive Member oldasdirt's Avatar
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    I'll preface this by saying I love both,having a cat and a dog,but I've always had a prefference toward cats.Not sure what that says about me in light of this,lol

    As seen in a dog's diary:

    7am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!

    8am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!

    9am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!

    Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!

    2pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!

    3pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!

    4pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!

    6pm - Oh boy! Mom! My favorite!

    7pm - Oh boy! Dad! My favorite!

    8pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!

    11pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in a people bed! My favorite!


    As seen in a cat's diary:


    Day 1283 of my captivity...


    My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre, little dangling objects.

    They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.

    The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild
    satisfaction I get from clawing the furniture.


    Tomorrow? I may eat another house plant.

    Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while
    they were walking, almost succeeded - must try this at the top of the
    stairs.

    In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again
    induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair - must try this on their
    bed.

    Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to
    make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear in
    their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little
    cat I was.

    Hmmm? Not working according to plan.

    There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in
    solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell
    the food More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to my
    powers of inducing "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use
    it to my advantage.

    I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The
    dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return He is
    obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an
    informant and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my
    every move.
    Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured.

    But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...

  2. #2
    HB Forum Moderator Alex's Avatar
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    hahaha.

    what about the purring, what is its nefarious meaning?

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