I think you might need to remind your stepmother that doll collecting is the second most common collecting hobby in the world, second only to stamps!
My parents have supported every one of my hobbies, but I have had the exact opposite situation with collecting dolls: I get more encouragement from them then I ever did collecting ponies, beanie babies, etc.! In fact, doll collecting is something my mother always wanted to share with me (though her collection is Molly and a few porcelians currently) and she's thrilled I finally got into dolls even if it took until I was 22 for me to get interested! She even gave me extra money for my birthday specifically to buy some doll/doll stuff with because she knows that dolls that come from holidays are even more important to me. I feel very lucky! [img]smile.gif[/img]
And I've never had trouble attracting men, but I have the mistake of trying to be someone else to keep the boyfriend happy and let me tell you, in the end you'll only end up resenting him. And feeling like you comprimised your diginity. Definetly not worth it, in my opinion.
I agree with everyone else that you should try to make a comprimise. If you're sharing a room with your niece, then maybe you could just keep the two ebay dolls you mentioned out so you two can play together. I guess that's only fair if you're sharing a room with her, but I would be a little hesitant to dispaly my good dolls around a child that young anyways if they weren't in a locked/supervised area anyways.
But if you have your own room and you can lock the door, I think you should ask to be allowed to at least have a doll or two displayed, and if they still think it's "unreasonable", you can always smuggle a doll home and keep her tucked away, only taking her out when you're alone. Of course, that doesn't work if you don't have your own room, but it's a thought if you do.
And above all, hold your head high! Life is meant to be enjoyed and as long as your enjoyment doesn't hurt anyone else or leave you bankrupt or even comprimises your morals, then who is anyone else to judge? Just think of it this way, they are the losers here because they obviously aren't comfortable with themselves if they can't handle other people's uniqueness! [img]smile.gif[/img]
Tell the wicked stepmother that I had many boyfriends before I finally found one to marry, and THEY ALL CONTRIBUTED TO MY TOY COLLECTION! My DH still contributes, albeit he doesn't "get it", but he still allows me to be "crazy".
As far as the attitude I can sense in your post, just remember that everyone gets their comeuppance.
If space is an issue you should have been allowed to determine which of your posessions were put into storage. You should be able to make sure that none of your posessiond were damaged, stolen or given away.
After reading your posts,it seems that maybe you step mom and you nieces mother might be jealous that you neice likes you and likes playing with you. I know people who dont want their kid liking any other adult because they want them to only like them. I think as long as you love your dolls, then thats all that matters. Besides I bet you are happier now with your dolls than she will ever be.
It makes me sad that so many young kids seem to be pushed out of their homes as soon as they go off to college. My oldest is 19, and I have a 15 and 13 yr olds coming up. I am going to be sure that they always feel they have "space" of their own at home, no matter where they are. I always had a room of my own until I got married, and then I had an apartment of my own. Nobody ever messed with my stuff. I had moved out on my own about 3 times and bounced back 3 times until I got married. I always had a room to come home to.I'm sorry your family doesn't give you more space and respect. I think you should be really proud of yourself and your accomplishments with school. I'm proud of you!!
~Annie
Jersey:
Hey, I'm totally feelin' you on the whole doll issue. My family is split in half; my mom and grandma think they are all supercute and love their clothes; my aunt and my stepdad both think it's a dumb hobby. So I just basically told the two naysayers that a) it's my room, I can do what I want (and I am in my early 20s) as long as I'm not hurting anyone/anything, and b) it's not THEIR money or time that I'm spending on the dolls, it's mine, and at least it's not alcohol, drugs, tobacco or anything else negative. Quite the contrary; if you ever sold your collection, you'd probably make more money than you put into it!!
So just take a deep breath and talk to your dad (and stepmom) about your collection and see if you can strike a deal with them (ie-you have only 2 dolls on display or something.) You should feel welcome in your own home and not feel like an imposition because of your collection. I know that whenever I go over to my mom's house, my stepdad won't even acknowledge that I have a room in their house anymore; my room is just "the blue room", not "Danni's room", even though my YOUNGER stepbrother still has HIS room even though he moved out 2 years ago! Needless to say, I ignore him and smile and still call it "my" room.
Also, one other suggestion: I know it's too late this year, but could you live at your college year-round, like sublease for 12 mo. instead of 9? That might solve your problem if home life gets to be too much. Just wanted to give you an option.
Jerseycow6, there are plenty of men out there secure enough with themselves to enjoy your hobby with you! Don't give up hope, and don't let anyone tell you different. My husband LOVES our AG dolls. I've tried to sell a few before, and he won't let me because he's attached to them! He totally 'gets' my collecting, and loves to build for them and collect too. He's even planning on buying Elizabeth for himself shortly. And no, he's not weird or abnormal. He is a very handsome, sweet, responsible level-headed person who wants to participate in his wife's interests! I'm sure if I collected pet rocks, he'd be just as enthusiastic!
I understand about the nay-sayers in the family too. Don't let them make you feel uneasy or second-guess yourself and your collection. Sometimes it's hard to do, I know. I probably would much more than I do if I didn't have hubby supporting me. My mom is the biggest doll hater. Everytime she comes to my house she says "Oh, I see you got another one of those things. You are just as tacky with your weird dolls as your dead Aunt Loreine." I guess I'm tacky then. I love them all, and I won't stop collecting because of what she says!
Be strong!!
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Bravo, Annie! My kids are 19 and 20. Both still know where home is and that's fine with me. I can't understand the rush to push young people out on their own when they're working hard to get an education, stay out of debt and make something of themselves.Originally posted by anniebeez:
It makes me sad that so many young kids seem to be pushed out of their homes as soon as they go off to college. My oldest is 19, and I have a 15 and 13 yr olds coming up. I am going to be sure that they always feel they have "space" of their own at home, no matter where they are. I always had a room of my own until I got married, and then I had an apartment of my own. Nobody ever messed with my stuff. I had moved out on my own about 3 times and bounced back 3 times until I got married. I always had a room to come home to.I'm sorry your family doesn't give you more space and respect. I think you should be really proud of yourself and your accomplishments with school. I'm proud of you!!
~Annie
As for disapproving of dolls, that's just sad. Anyone so insecure and judgemental has some big issues of their own they'd be better off dealing with.
When I hear about problems like this, I remind myself of the old story about the Chinese emperor who got very angry at a philosopher and threatened to execute him unless the philosopher could tell him one thing that was always, unfailingly true. The philosopher thought for a moment and said, "This too shall pass." He lived.
Here's what I told my family (DH and 3 DS's who all think I'm in my 2nd childhood)--
"I'm an adult collector; this is a legitimate hobby." (Remember to hold your head high, and speak with dignity.)
One could elaborate from there; but with guys, the fewer words, the better--somehow they don't like listening to women talk. [img]graemlins/whatever.gif[/img]
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">I totally agree. My oldest son is 20 and lives most of that time 4 hours away at his college. We are building a new house and went to the extra expense of still providing a room for him even though we know his time with us will be limited. I always want him to feel he can come home. Once he is totally on his own, the room can always find a use as a doll room, LOL!!!!!!!!Originally posted by anniebeez:
It makes me sad that so many young kids seem to be pushed out of their homes as soon as they go off to college. My oldest is 19, and I have a 15 and 13 yr olds coming up. I am going to be sure that they always feel they have "space" of their own at home, no matter where they are. I always had a room of my own until I got married, and then I had an apartment of my own. Nobody ever messed with my stuff. I had moved out on my own about 3 times and bounced back 3 times until I got married. I always had a room to come home to.I'm sorry your family doesn't give you more space and respect. I think you should be really proud of yourself and your accomplishments with school. I'm proud of you!!
~Annie
When I was a girl, my Mom remarried a great guy when I was 14. My Dad has died when I was 13. I really liked my step Dad as a friendly person, but I felt pressured to move out early on. Their house was never the "home" I had when my Mom and Dad were married. That is the difficult thing about some step families. Sometimes, there are parenting differences that are hard to overcome.
Jersey, I wonder if your Dad really knows how your feel? [img]graemlins/wonder.gif[/img]
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