"I'm a big tease." OR "Toldya I was

[Knight_Crawler]

Allright, here it is! The moment no one has been waiting for! The unveiling of the teaser for my Don't-Call-It-A-Fan-Fic! I even am abusing my Moderatory powers and making it stick at the top of the board.

Let me know exactly what you think!

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Just a warning. It's not exactly Happy-Go-Lucky, cotton candy, bubble gum fare. It's got a little gore, and the images can be a little disturbing. So before you go reading it, decide whether or not you want to, know that it's probably PG-13, maybe R if you have a really good imagination.
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<font color="#2c557f" size="1">[ April 09, 2002 01:41 AM: Message edited by: UltimateCrawler ]</font>

[Knight_Crawler]

The X Factor #1/2
written by Christopher Stuck
[email protected]

July 19, 1953 -- Korea

Sean Cassiday sat motionless, his face blank, his ears ringing. He had been staring at the shattered, bloody face for nearly two hours. At first, he had been utterly mortified at what had befallen his young lover, but that soon gave way to wonder and a sense of power. He was guiltily happy with himself. He was powerful. Finally.

Sean was the child of Irish immigrants, and had inherited their thick Irish accent, though he was born in New York. He was the youngest of 8 children and was certainly the runt of the litter. Joining the United States Army was a way to show his family that he wasn't their little baby. He wasn't helpless. Sean barely made it through basic; the strenuous exercise had nearly broken his frail frame. But he had made it, and he was proud. And now, he found that he was truly strong. No one would ever look down upon him again. He smiled with pride.

But as he stared at the mishmash of bone, blood, and brain, the guilt overtook the happiness. Not the guilt of having killed this girl. She was only a native, after all. She didn't matter. It was the pure guilt of a freak. What the hell was happening to him? He ran the scene in his head over and over, frantically trying to make sense of it.

He and the girl snuck off into the trees. He was AWOL, but a man has needs, they wouldn't punish him too severely. He figured they'd probably praise him for finally having the balls to do something without being told. Anyway, this war would never end and they'd need him.

She didn't speak much English, but she knew the value of his American money. She also knew the value of the American money of the rest of the soldiers, and wasn't going to waste any time. She stripped as soon as they were out of sight of the camp, and started to help the thin little American boy out of his uniform.

He stopped her and stood her up. He kissed her clumsily and squeezed her arms in his hands roughly. She squirmed a little and slipped down to the ground, pulling him with her. He smiled as he felt his heart pound in his chest. This was so dangerous, so exciting. So many reasons not to, which was all the more reason to go through with it. She kissed him quickly and began undoing his belt. He began whispering to her.

"Yee're a filthy li'l whore, aren'tcha? Yee're nay even worth my money. May'e Aye'll just kill yeh once Aye'm done. Yee're *ggunnkk*"

His voice caught in his throat with a sharp pain. He couldn't breathe. He began to panic. Grasping, feeling for a wound, he found only skin. His Adam's Apple felt bigger. Maybe his glands were swollen? There was a lot of that going around. This filthy place...

The Korean girl looked worried. Was this one going to run away, too? She pulled him back down on top of her and kissed him. She had wasted a couple hours getting him this far and he hadn't paid yet.

That little whore. He just wanted to scream at her. But he still couldn't breathe. He struggled to swallow. He tried to gag. He tried to clear his throat. He tried to speak. Nothing worked. He squeezed his voice box with his fingers...

He coughed. The blockage dislodged a little, and he took a wheezing, gasping breath.

"YOU LITTLE WHOO<font size=+1>OOO</font><font size=+2>OOO</font><font size=+1>OOO</font>ORE!!!"

His voice exploded from his mouth. He could feel the vibration through his entire head as his voice reached inpossible volume. His ear drums burst and he winced in pain, but his eyes stayed open in shock.

Her body seized beneath him and her face caved in on itself.

[hiddencrawler]

[img]graemlins/thumbs_up.gif[/img] Cool!! Though.... wow.... um..

Oh! I know! More story!! What happens next?? Can you tell us?? Pleassssee? [img]smile.gif[/img]

[Slartibartfast]

Yup, I'd say that's an "R." Very good, I like it. It's very gritty, very modern despite the setting, and has the feel of something that would actually be in an X book nowadays. One note: Isn't Sean's name spelled Cassidy, not Cassiday?

Now I'm going to take offense to the "don't-call-it-a-fan-fic" comment. I take offense because I get the feeling the comment is made to distance your work from fan fic. Probably because of the commonly held "fan fic is crap" misconception. Just because something is called "fan fiction" and is written by someone who is not a professional in the comics field doesn't reduce its worth. The worth is in the story itself, not in the label placed upon it. Even some pros write fan fic between jobs or for fun. It is true that a lot of fic -- heck, even most -- is utter crap, but not everything. All works that fall under the label of "fan fiction" shouldn't be judged by some of the dregs people post at sites like fanfiction.net. End rant.

[Knight_Crawler]

I'm distancing my self from Fan Fic not because I think Fan Fic is crap. I want to avoid that label not only because a lot of other people think that it is, but also because I feel that this isn't Fan Fic.

This story is part of a Universe along the same lines as Ultimate, so really it's not like I'm writing stories of established characters in established universes...

Also, this will be a full comic in a few months, with art and everything. This is just a prose version of the script for the comic. I just have to either find an artist or get my ass in gear and draw it myself. I don't even really want to call this a Fan Comic...

Oh, and I guess nobody got the joke...still waiting to see if anyone does.

<font color="#2c557f" size="1">[ April 10, 2002 05:51 PM: Message edited by: UltimateCrawler ]</font>

[NightcrawlersLove]

'smiles wide' nice work my friend...lol nothing to be ashamed if u write any type of fanfic heck i write the crap myself lol,keep it coming knighty!! [img]graemlins/star.gif[/img]

[Hsu]

I'll say it again, very nice! Now how to we define fan fic. It's fiction written by a fan correct? So itsn't all of those X-Nivel things some sort of Fan Fic? And true this is an alternate universe thing so thus does not go under the same category, but whatever.

Looking for joke....

[NightcrawlersLove]

hsu we will leave it as a story that has been written by knighty lol there no title no judgement .......hey hsu i see the little elf picc under ur nic i got that same pic on a t-shirt lol x-babies it has em all...... [img]graemlins/heart.gif[/img]

[Hsu]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size=2 face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><table border="0" width="90%" bgcolor="#333333" cellspacing="1" cellpadding="0"><tr><td width="100%"><table border="0" width="100%" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2" bgcolor="#FF9900"><tr><td width="100%" bgcolor="#DDDDDD"><font size=2 face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Originally posted by NightcrawlersLove:
hey hsu i see the little elf picc under ur nic i got that same pic on a t-shirt lol x-babies it has em all...... [img]graemlins/heart.gif[/img] </font></td></tr></table></td></tr></table></BLOCKQUOTE>

Yeah it's from the cover for X-Babies Reborn. They fight the Mighty 'Vengers! It's funny, it's cute..... it bombed.

(Hsu's notes that he is a dumbass and posted twice! DUMBASS)

[Fasheem]

Hmm, graphic...

*waits for David Usher* [img]wink.gif[/img]