Printable View
I'm glad you're feeling better Kat [img]smile.gif[/img]
I think my wierd little POV is that if we are serious about wanting the fanclub to change even a little bit how they do business, we have to walk a fine line between coming across as being conscientious (er did i could spell that right @_@) and looking like we complain about every little thing. I mean, this only matters if we really would like them to listen to us, otherwise my point doesn't really apply then.
It takes both parties to change huh Steen? [img]smile.gif[/img] I'm willing if they're willing.
If they're ready to parlay, I'm ready to cool it.
<font size="3" face="Tempus sans ITC, Papyrus,Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">I know Steen.. but the truth is they arent ever going to listen to us EVER EVER EVER!!! They dont get into discussion even pleasant about anything. They dont want to they dont even see why they have to. I guess I am no longer playing the I will be nice to them and they will be nice to me game. I think we have given waaaaaaaaaaay to much and I for one havent got another thing to give. I doubt I will see any kind words out of them any day soon or anywhere in the future.. its just not in their intellect levels to actually discuss or care. I think they are rude and ignorant and downright nasty to boot. If they want to please me its all up to them after all its their business.Quote:
Originally posted by sunhawk:
I'm glad you're feeling better Kat [img]smile.gif[/img]
I think my wierd little POV is that if we are serious about wanting the fanclub to change even a little bit how they do business, we have to walk a fine line between coming across as being conscientious (er did i could spell that right @_@) and looking like we complain about every little thing. I mean, this only matters if we really would like them to listen to us, otherwise my point doesn't really apply then.
*edited to add* I just wanted to say that I am not saying this to be like "oh of their mean I will be too" Its more why waste one more breath on giving a toss on what they think?? There was a brief opportunity at one stage for both sides to coexist they chose to throw that away so I am past even caring to understand. So I think I will just carry on being the eternal complainer. I dont really care if they change or not.. cause Im not ever going back to them. I just like to comment on what they do or dont do because it amazes me what they do.
Kat
<font color="#000000" size="1">[ July 17, 2005 04:31 AM: Message edited by: Kattitude ]</font>
<font size="3" face="Tempus sans ITC, Papyrus,Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">I understand what you are saying Steen!!! You are right theres no point complaining about everthing its tiring and annoying LOL. I dont think that for the most we do. We let alot slide I think. Sometimes we ark up yeh. I think like you say we are in a mutual non communicate with each other truce. It works best that way. I guess I try not to think of this site as being read by FC peoples.. even though its public and anyones free to read. I just see it as a private place to air our thoughts at the time. These thoughts are of course everchanging.Quote:
Originally posted by sunhawk:
I appreciate what you are saying Kat, and lord knows i have had my share of bitchfests about the fanclub because, i agree, they do a lot of things that puzzle, annoy or occasionally enrage. And we are all at different levels of antagonism with the fanclub, some of us having more personal confrontations and some not.
I just think it's kinda sad to adopt a defeatist attitude towards them, because they are people and we are people and where people are, communication is possible. Maybe in the case of the fanclub, it's highly unlikely. And i'm not really trying to dissuade anyone from saying anything, i mean it's not like any of us are sending the fanclub constant harrassment. They stick to themselves, we stick to ourselves here, for the most part we are in a sort of accidental truce by means of mutual purposeful non-communication. In a way, right now the fanclub's lack of communication is almost good because while a lack of response from them can be highly irritating, can you imagine what it would be like if they responded to everything we said about them? It'd be nonstop aggro, the kind that can be incredibly draining. The last sustained bbs fight i can remember probably didn't last more than 2 days and yet i felt exhausted for days afterward, at least mentally.
My point isn't even really about the fanclub, about hurting their feelings or being unfair to them. It's more about making ourselves seem small and petty. Is it worth it to come across in a certain way in order to complain about everything they do? Maybe i'm just being unfair to you guys by pressing my own expectations on you. The irony of having expectations about people talking about their expectations about the fanclub isn't lost on me *chuckle*
Anyway, i just hope you guys know i mean well, i hope i'm not offending anyone *blush* I think the point I am trying to make is that ideally we are as carefully about ourselves as we are about the fanclub.
Anyways I guess I hoped we didnt come across too :whingy: about it all. I think it was just intended to be shocked that they responded to anything and that just lead to us being the discussiony types we are lol
In the end none of it really matters! I think for the most we are fair and rational and are willing to listen to all accounts of a situation and then discuss the pros and cons lol
Kat
Here's my two cents .... for what it's worth.
I think that true communication has to be mutual and direct. Otherwise we're doing is reading into another person's actions what we want to see. It might be that they are trying. OR it might be the same old same old 'defend Darren at all costs' crap. But we have no way of knowing because we don't have communication with the other party.
And as harsh as it sounds, should we care if they're trying??? In a sense, it puts things in a fairly personal level. .............. I guess that if you want to be involved in the fan club, then yes it matters if they're trying or not. The thing is that celebrities and their staff do things every day, and I often have opinions about what they do. But that's as far as it goes and both sides drift happily into the night doing and thinking as they please. To me, this really isn't any different.
<font size="3" face="Tempus sans ITC, Papyrus,Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">To me trying matters if when people complained they expressed it with a purpose other than just complaining. Otherwise...its just whining imo. To me it is unfair to nitpick when they do and nitpick when they don't. To me, I guess it is the difference between constructive criticism and just complaining.Quote:
Originally posted by Dyan:
But we have no way of knowing because we don't have communication with the other party.
And as harsh as it sounds, should we care if they're trying??? In a sense, it puts things in a fairly personal level. .............. I guess that if you want to be involved in the fan club, then yes it matters if they're trying or not.
I guess I am just not sure what people expect. I guess I'm not sure what communication with the other party you are thinking of. I understand the point about being surprised and questioning what they choose to communicate. Given the history..I can see that. But I'm not sure that means that they shouldn't get credit for trying to communicate.
Another thought...D's image is part of Tracey's job running the fanclub. I think she'd be doing a lousy job if the purpose of her communication wasn't to protect that image.
I appreciate what you are saying Kat, and lord knows i have had my share of bitchfests about the fanclub because, i agree, they do a lot of things that puzzle, annoy or occasionally enrage. And we are all at different levels of antagonism with the fanclub, some of us having more personal confrontations and some not.
I just think it's kinda sad to adopt a defeatist attitude towards them, because they are people and we are people and where people are, communication is possible. Maybe in the case of the fanclub, it's highly unlikely. And i'm not really trying to dissuade anyone from saying anything, i mean it's not like any of us are sending the fanclub constant harrassment. They stick to themselves, we stick to ourselves here, for the most part we are in a sort of accidental truce by means of mutual purposeful non-communication. In a way, right now the fanclub's lack of communication is almost good because while a lack of response from them can be highly irritating, can you imagine what it would be like if they responded to everything we said about them? It'd be nonstop aggro, the kind that can be incredibly draining. The last sustained bbs fight i can remember probably didn't last more than 2 days and yet i felt exhausted for days afterward, at least mentally.
My point isn't even really about the fanclub, about hurting their feelings or being unfair to them. It's more about making ourselves seem small and petty. Is it worth it to come across in a certain way in order to complain about everything they do? Maybe i'm just being unfair to you guys by pressing my own expectations on you. The irony of having expectations about people talking about their expectations about the fanclub isn't lost on me *chuckle*
Anyway, i just hope you guys know i mean well, i hope i'm not offending anyone *blush* I think the point I am trying to make is that ideally we are as carefully about ourselves as we are about the fanclub.
<font size="3" face="Tempus sans ITC, Papyrus,Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">I agree, that is the difference between constructive criticism and just complaining. But, I (and I suspect others here) weren't doing either one. We were discussing events and what we thought of those events. That's all. And I definately didn't expect that my initial question would lead to this thread. *laughs and shakes head* Btw, I also know that at least one person who made comments on the anti board didn't have any expectations that comment would be read OR that they'd get back to Tracey.Quote:
Originally posted by mlue:
To me trying matters if when people complained they expressed it with a purpose other than just complaining. Otherwise...its just whining imo. To me it is unfair to nitpick when they do and nitpick when they don't. To me, I guess it is the difference between constructive criticism and just complaining.
I guess I am just not sure what people expect. I guess I'm not sure what communication with the other party you are thinking of. I understand the point about being surprised and questioning what they choose to communicate. Given the history..I can see that. But I'm not sure that means that they shouldn't get credit for trying to communicate.
Another thought...D's image is part of Tracey's job running the fanclub. I think she'd be doing a lousy job if the purpose of her communication wasn't to protect that image.[/QB]
So you see, it's neither criticism nor complaining. And there is absolutely NO expectations. Not that anyone would read it. Not that they'd care if they were to read it. And certainly not that they'd DO anything about what they read. lol
Btw, I also agree about Tracey's job.
I do have to say if Traceys job is about D's image.. well I can tell you now she hasnt done a very good job of promoting, protecting or enhancing it in any postive light to my mind lol
Kat
There was a time when I would have cared that they'd communicated with the fans, but I'm beyond all that now and it's a case of it being too little, too late.
Oh and Kat's right, Tracey has done very little to help with Darren's image, as far as I'm concerned.
Michelle
xx