Luck, be a lady.

[physiognomy]

<center>Oh, I know what they all say. All those gamblers and lovers, sinners and saviors--
"Luck, be a lady." Well, sorry boys. That isn't happening anytime soon.





I think it's cute, honestly. I have no idea where they came up with this image of a platinum blond in a slinky red dress and fuck-me-red lips. Although I have put lipstick on once in my life, that was one time too many.


I should think my purpose is obvious, right? Mary and Saint can't little that hot mama Fate have her run of the place, right? So they made me. Tada! Luck. You can call me L. Most everyone does. I feel like I'm from Men in Black or something. Anyway! To balance out all of Fate's grahgrah angst, those powers above created a force that may or may not tip the scales of the future. Besides, if those little ol' seers knew how everything worked out, life would be boooooring. They sort of see.. the basic layout of what's to come, assuming that no one affects the outcome.


Like me. Harmless, little old L.


And sure, Fate's got herself a mighty fine plan to mess all this stuff up. Heck if I know what's gonna happen.


She's hot though. Dizzamn.</center>

[physiognomy]

<center>Okay. I admit it. I have problems.


I like fucking historic women. I have a list somewhere, I might've lost it though. Cleopatra, Queen Victoria, Queen Elizabeth, Victoria Woolf, Marilyn Monroe-- oh yes, that was quite a night. One of the best fucks I had in a good few decades.


Can you guess which decade I was fucking Fate? The Fifties. You can tell. Nothing is really chaotic and terrible, but nothing's wonderful and awesome either-- it was life in it's simpliest form.


You can tell when we broke up because that's when all the wars started happening again. Whoops!


But really, those poor little seers-- they've been down on their luck for so long and damn, they really need to just fuck eachother and realize what idiots they are-- but hey, I'm patient.


I am a patient, lucky man. And I have a big penis. Whoo boy!</center>

[physiognomy]

<center>The whole big family has come to town! Yay! Huzzah! I am going to bake a cake!

I need to get laaaaaid! Whee!


Man, I love earth. Earth is awesome. Where else can you get completely wasted and then end up sticking your head between someone's boobs? I am going to find Mary and Saint and HUG THEM for making these wonderful, vain little humans.


Oh my oh my, all the breasts!


Hope has a nice set of breasticles. I wonder where she's at.


Anyway! I think I have successfully nudged Fate away from Rou and Deacon for a bit with my sheer annoying nature. Luck is very annoying, you know. Just when you need it, it doesn't come to you. It's funny how Luck controls Fate and Fate controls Luck. It's like some kind of exotic dance, a tug-o-war. It's why we're so compatible. I'm a Libra. I'm charismatic. She's a-- crap, I forgot. But I swear we're compatible.


I'm really not a big giant penis, honest!


I ran into John today. That poor kid. I don't know if old man Luck can save him now-- he got lucky when Mary saved him, and let me tell you, that was a lot of luck right there. Fate's going to mess that bastard up, even if he has been playing the role of the recluse. He's got some teeth, though. He can bite if he wants to.


Even a human could bite Fate. Or me-- or Hope, or Destiny, Love-- any of them. People don't realize their potentials often enough. It's sort of sad.


Jesus Christ I'm drunk.


Man, I miss Jesus. He was a good guy. Likes his wine, that bugger does.</center>