bridges are meant for burning - rocco young

[en route]

We been runnin` away from
Somethin` we both know
We`ve long run out of things to say
And I think I better go

So don't be getting excited
When you hear that slammin` door
`Cause there'll be one less set of footsteps
On your floor (in the mornin`)

And we`ve been hidin` from somethin`
That should have never gone this far
But after all it's what we`ve done
That makes us what we are

And you been talkin` in silence
But if it`s silence you adore
There'll be one less set of footsteps
On your floor (in the mornin`)

Well there`ll be one less set of footsteps on your floor
One less man to walk in
One less pair of jeans on your door
One less voice a-talkin`

But tomorrow`s a dream away
Today has turned to dust
Your silver tongue has turned to clay
And your golden rule to rust

Well if that`s the way that you want it
That`s the way I want it more
Well they`ll be one less set of footsteps
On your floor (in the mornin`)



Part One.

Full Name: Rocco Wade Young.
Goes by: Rocco, Roc
Current location: Los Angeles, California
Description: Simple apartment, looking over the city. Really nice view, you should see it sometime
Occupation: Detective for the LAPD
Current age: Twenty-three
Date of birth: July 28
Birthplace: Brooklyn, New York

Name(s), age(s), and occupation(s) of parent(s):

Mother is Jeannette Rachael Monaghan, 60 years old, retired. Father is Reggie Marshall Young, 73 years old, deadbeat and in Vegas

Name(s), age(s), and occupation(s) of sibling(s):

Donny Robert Monaghan, 39 years old, stock market goon
James Marshall Monaghan, 34 years old, ``self-employed``
Kenneth Marshall Monaghan, 31 years old, journalist
Robbie Jacob Monaghan, 28 years old, music producer

Height: 5?11"
Weight: I don`t go on scales
Hair color: Brown
Eye color: Brown
Left-, right-handed, or ambidextrous: Left-handed
Heritage/Nationality: Italian, Greek, and French
Religion: Good Catholic boy
Education: High school, college, police training
Marital status: Living it up
Children: None ? thank God

Part Two.

Likes: My Audi, blondes, blonde jokes, speeding, dine-and-dash, the occasional 3 AM drunk phone call, alcohol, bourbon, vodka, whiskey, cigarettes, Marlboros, bullets, irreversible brain damage, Mom
Dislikes: Feminists, neo-nazis, getting hit with things, lingering love
Phobias: Not a damn one

Part Three: Do you.

Smoke: Jesus Christ, yes
Cuss: Yeah
Sing well: I don?t sing
Sing in the shower: No
Talk to yourself: No
Believe in yourself: Of course
Play an instrument: I know how to play some piano
Want to go to college?: No
Want to get married?: Not particularly
Want to have children?: Hell no
Think you're a health freak?: No
Get along with your parents?: I adore my mother, my father?s an asshole
Get along with your siblings?: Just Robbie and Kenny

Part Four: Current.

Clothes: White t-shirt, jeans, white socks
Mood: Numb
Music: Jim Croce ? One Less Set Of Footsteps
Taste: Bourbon
Make-up: Yeah, right
Hair-style: I can`t really have a hairstyle, it?s almost not there
Annoyance: Beyond-sleeping exhaustion
Smell: Burned bread
Book you're reading: I don`t really read, seeing as it?s all I do at work
CD in CD Player: Jim Croce`s Photographs and Memories
DVD in player: I don`t have one of those
Refreshment: Alcohol
Worry: I might not get at least two hours of sleep tonight

Part Five: Favorites.

Food: Mom`s casserole
Drink: Anything to get me shit-faced
Color: Platinum
Album: Fuck if I know
Shoes: Converse black high top sneakers
Candy: Reese`s
Animal: Dogs
TV Show: West Wing
Movie: Kill Bill
Song: Music isn`t really my forte
Girl's name: Adelaide
Boy's name: Rocco
Vegetable: Corn
Fruit: Grapes

Part Six.

If I were a month, I'd be: April
If I were a day of the week, I'd be: Friday
If I were a time of day, I'd be: 11:43 PM
If I were a planet, I'd be: Jupiter
If I were a sea animal, I'd be: Shark
If I were a direction, I'd be: North
If I were a piece of furniture, I'd be: Ottoman
If I were a sin, I'd be: Don?t even get me started
If I were a historical figure, I'd be: JFK
If I were a liquid, I'd be: Whiskey
If I were a tree, I'd be: Redwood
If I were a bird, I'd be: Blue jay
If I were a flower, I'd be: Some yellow thing
If I were a kind of weather, I'd be: Heavy rain
If I were a mythical creature, I'd be: Uh, I can only think of a unicorn and I sure as hell don?t want to be that
If I were a musical instrument, I'd be: Trumpet
If I were an animal, I'd be: Turtle
If I were a color, I'd be: Black
If I were an emotion, I'd be: Pissed off
If I were a vegetable, I'd be: Carrot
If I were a sound, I'd be: CLANG
If I were an element, I'd be: Fire
If I were a car, I'd be: Fuckin` Audi
If I were a song, I'd be: Elliot Smith ? Needle In The Hay
If I were a movie, I'd be: Pulp Fiction
If I were a food, I'd be: Spaghetti
If I were a place, I'd be: Brooklyn, NY
If I were a material, I'd be: Mesh ? that?s a material, right?
If I were a taste, I'd be: Sour
If I were a scent, I'd be: Uh?
If I were a religion, I'd be: Atheism
If I were a word, I'd be: Fuck
If I were an object, I'd be: A bat ? the kind you hit people with
If I were a body part, I'd be: Lower back
If I were a facial expression, I'd be: Disbelief
If I were a part of a house, I'd be: The shower
If I were a subject in school, I'd be: PE
If I were a cartoon character, I'd be: The roadrunner
If I were a shape, I'd be a: Circle
If I were a number, I'd be: 1



<font color="#7F8190"><font size="1">[ May 28, 2004 04:13 AM: Message edited by: en route ]</font></font>

<font color="#7F8190" size="1">[ May 28, 2004 04:14 AM: Message edited by: en route ]</font>

[en route]

What time was it anyways? Lifting his head straight off the pillow, he could only see the oak headboard in front of him. But he could hear a thousand different things; the phone ringing accompanied with the ringing in his ears was particularly loud. He couldn?t even see his alarm clock, which for some reason irritated him. Left hand slammed on the telephone and picked it up. With much difficulty he finally got it to his ear.

`` Mmnngh. Hello? ``

`` Rocky! ``

There was a pause, on his end it was of horror and disappointment. It would have been better if it were a telemarketer. On the other end, he could hear a gasp ? he knew it was of realization.

`` Rocky, are you just waking up? ``

He could lie, save himself some time, but if he made no sense or stumbled through the conversation she would think he was on drugs.

`` Well, no. You woke me up. ``

`` Hmm. ``

She seemed to have lost interest, her voice fading in the background of his pounding headache.

`` Ma, is there something you need? ``

It wasn?t that he meant to sound snippy, it just happened. She let out a wail, something much louder than he would?ve liked. Groaning, he pulled the phone from his ear until the sound died down. When it did, all he could hear were quiet sobs.

`` Ma, I?m sorry. I didn?t mean to sound like that. ``

She didn?t answer.

`` For Chrissakes, Ma -- ``

That was when she finally did answer.

`` Don?t you use the Lord?s name in vain, Rocco Wade Young! And just because you don?t like your mother doesn?t mean you can disrespect her with those hurtful comments! I ought to come down there right now and bend you over my knee. You?re not too old! ``

Throwing his face down into the pillow, he kept the phone to his ear. He knew better than to interject with his own thoughts, she would be at it for at least another five minutes.

`` Rocky, when are ya gonna stop smoking? ``

He frowned, eyes still closed and his face still pressed into the pillow.

`` I?m not. ``

`` What? You sound all muffled, Rocky. What the hell are you doing over there? ``

Lifting his head off the pillow, he supported himself on his elbows.

`` I?m not. ``

`` Don?t say that, Rocky, there?s always a chance. ``

`` Ma -- ``

He stopped himself. It wasn?t a smart move.

`` Really, Ma, is there something I can do for you today? ``

`` Rocky, I just wanna talk to my son. Is there a problem with that? What are you doing that?s so fucking important? You can?t spend a little time on the phone with your goddamn mother? How else am I supposed to see my baby boy? He never comes and visits me. ``

Rocco groaned, rubbing his face with his hand.

`` Ma, I visit you every week. You make me dinner. Remember? ``

There was silence on the other end.

`` Your father called me. ``

There was silence on his end.

`` It wasn?t a pleasant conversation as you could imagine, Rocky, but he told me he wants to see you. You?re the only one of his sons that doesn?t talk to him. ``

`` That?s not true either, Ma. Kenny and Robbie don?t talk to him either. ``

`` Well, couldn?t you at least pretend to like him? He would really like a call from you. ``

`` Ma! What the hell?s wrong with you? ``

`` What?! ``

`` The man left you and your five kids to be with his secretary ? twenty-three years younger than him might I add ? and took off for Vegas without a damn word! You of all people should be ignoring him. He?s scum Ma. ``

`` Rocky, that?s not a very nice thing to say. Besides, I?m a woman of forgiveness. ``

`` Bullshit. ``

`` Rocco Wade! ``

`` It?s true, Ma! You hold grudges longer than anyone I know. You expect me to believe you forgive this man for all the shit he put you through? ``

If that was the case, the conversation was over. But there was silence, once again, on the other end.

`` I really like the record you bought me. ``

`` It?s a CD, Ma. ``

`` It looks like a little record, only metallic and shiny. I like it a lot Rocky. I?ve been listening to it all morning while I have been cleaning. ``

`` What have you been cleaning, Ma? ``

`` The apartment. ``

There was a stinging pain biting at the back of his eyes. It could have been from all the alcohol he had or it could have been the realization of how shitty his mother?s life really was.

`` Ma. I have enough money to move you into a nice condo. Remember when we went to the mountains when I was like twelve? We could go there and get you a condo, Ma. You don?t have to live in the shithole of retirement communities. ``

She was quiet for a moment.

`` Rocco Wade Young, I want you to understand I am here because my friends are here. I love it here. ``

`` Ma, you don?t have to fucking punish yourself! You didn?t do anything wrong! You deserve to live just like him. No, he deserves to live like you are right now, in some cramped apartment. You deserve the luxury suites and lights of Vegas. ``

`` I hate Vegas. ``

`` Ma, you love Vegas. You hate Dad. ``

`` I love your father. ``

And that was all he needed. Hanging up the phone, he set his head back down on the pillow. He might be able to get an extra hour of sleep in before his alarm clock rang. He didn?t even know what time it was. But, that was when the sound of the radio burst into his head, the annoying disc jockey telling him to step outside, it was a wonderful afternoon.

Maybe for everyone but him.

<font color="#7F8190" size="1">[ May 28, 2004 04:14 PM: Message edited by: en route ]</font>

[en route]

My Ma says I don?t deserve a car like the one I have. My brothers say I don?t use it the way it should be used. I think that?s all bullshit. My Audi could quite possibly be the best thing in my life. So, anyway, a lot of people have been asking me how I got it and I figure I?d better just tell them because I can?t keep telling the same story over and over. It gets real old real fast.



So, here?s how it happened. I was undercover to get information in a double homicide case. It turns out the asshole?s a car salesman at this Audi distributor downtown. So, I go down to the Audi dealer and ask for the guy by name. I tell him my friend bought a car from him, said he cut him a great deal. The guy was slick, like all car salesmen, and he was real interested in me seeing every car. Now, keep in mind, I don?t make shit. I have to act like some rich bastard just to come off credible. He would ask me if I had any country club memberships. I said yes and asked him about his country club memberships. The bastard goes on for like twenty minutes telling me how amazing this one golf course was. He spent a night out there playing golf with some friends and it was amazing, apparently.

When asked what night, the asshole changed the subject and then took me over to this little display they had and registered me for some big car giveaway. They were giving away a 2004 Audi TT Roadster and a 2004 Audi TT Coupe. He signed me up for both and that was when he headed in to talk about my goddamn credit. I hate credit checks. I could dance pretty fast around him so it wasn?t that big of a deal. I had some nice false information for him.

Anyway, I slipped up during this thing and the guy gets my real credit all over the computer screen. I?m in deep shit because I can?t just leave, that would look way too fuckin? suspicious, right? So, all of a sudden, we hear this yelling. A cute blonde in a red suit comes in and asks me if I?m Rocco Young. I realize I gave him my real name. Now, remember, this was like my first assignment in that department and I was all over the place. I?m way better now.

Anyway, the blonde holds out that little paper the guy filled out and says ?You won the Roadster!? Apparently the drawing was like two minutes after he filled it out. So, I didn?t need a fucking credit check. The guy was steamed.

So, now I have this gorgeous Audi TT Roadster that I zoom around in all the time. They took a picture of me in the car and they have it hanging in the guy?s office. I was knocked off the case for being too ?high profile.? I guess that?s what happens when you win a damn luxury sports car.

[en route]

Guess that it was bound to happen
Was just a matter of time
But now I`ve come to my decision
And it`s a-one of the painful kind
`Cause now it seems that you wanted a martyr
Just a regular guy wouldn`t do
But baby I can`t hang upon no lover`s cross for you

You really got to hand it to ya
`Cause girl you really tried
But for every time that we spent laughin`
There were two times that I cried
And you were tryin` to make me your martyr
And that's the one thing I just couldn`t do
`Cause baby, I can't hang upon no lover`s cross for you

`Cause tables are meant for turnin`
And people are bound to change
And bridges are meant for burnin`
When the people and memories they join aren`t the same

Still I hope that you can find
Another who can take what I could not
He`ll have to be a super guy
Or maybe a super god
`Cause I never was much of a martyr before
And I ain`t bout to start nothin` new
And baby, I can`t hang upon no lover`s cross for you

<font color="#7F8190" size="1">[ May 28, 2004 11:27 PM: Message edited by: en route ]</font>

[en route]

`` Rocky. I have to tell you, your generation scares me. ``

`` Why, Ma? ``

`` Maggie?s son changed his name. He got a tattoo and he wears clothing five other boys could fit into -- at the same time! His grammar is horrible and he is physically threatening. I just don?t know how to explain it, Rocky. ``

Rocco was silent. This time he had been in the middle of actually making himself a meal. He hadn?t had a home-cooked meal in forever and tonight was deemed spaghetti night in his mind. But, Rocco?s mother wouldn?t have him cooking without her. Having driven all the way to the retirement community, he picked up his mother and had to switch cars.

`` Yours is much too fast, Rocky, I?m afraid you?ll kill me! ``

It didn?t matter that he drove it every day or was one of the more experienced (and albeit more dangerous drivers when his mother wasn?t present) drivers on the road.

`` Well, it?s a different generation, Ma. `` Rocco really didn?t know what to say.

The noodles were taking forever to cook. This was why he always ordered out.

`` I don?t think I told you, Rocky, but I was so glad you brought Stella over the other day. ``

Rocco stopped moving, eyes lifting up to the kitchen cabinet directly in front of his face. Crouching a bit, he saw his mother at the table, thumbing through a Landsend catalog. He wasn?t sure if he would be better off saying nothing or saying everything. His mother was tricky like that.

`` She is such a beautiful woman. `` She paused, placing a hand on her collarbone for added drama. `` It just takes my breath away. She should model. `` She nodded, as if this was what Stella was to do the next day.

`` Yeah. `` Was all he said in response.

`` Why don?t you give her a ring, already, Rocco? `` Uh oh, she had used his real name. This meant trouble.

He stood straight up and continued to stir the heated pots on his stove, staying quiet.

`` Rocco Wade Young -- you answer me this second! `` Uh oh, the whole name.

Thinking for a second, he opened his mouth, which was all she could see with the kitchen cabinets blocking her view.

`` I?m not ready for that, Ma. `` Ah, the safe ?I?m not ready?. He hoped this would work.

`` What?s wrong with you, Rocky!? `` Okay, so it didn?t.

`` What? ``

`` You have the most gorgeous girl in all of LA and you want to tell me you?re not ready to have her all to yourself for eternity? `` His mother had apparently become a born-again romantic.

`` Ma, trust me, you haven?t seen Stella. ``

`` Of course I have. You brought her over to my apartment twice! ``

Rocco was quiet again, `` No, you haven?t seen her. ``