Week 10, Preview

[mpaul]

Week 10

Here we go. With just four weeks left, now's your time to either firm up your position for the playoffs or hire a good assassin. Presenting the All-Haiku Edition of the previews! Because why not!

1. Darren vs. Ron:
The race for second
But how sad if he loses
Against a robot?

2. Murray vs. Megan:
There will be bloodshed
The lawyer's team is deadly
Murray needs to cheat.

3. Jose vs. Anthony/Someone
Oh, the coming hate
Anthony vs. Android
Wackiness ensues!

4. Rob vs. Jon
Two last place teams play
For respect, pride, the future
And mockery! Yay!

5. MJ vs. Jeri
The reason she plays
Is to beat me and laugh, clap
Bitter? Of course not!

There you go. Hey, what do you want? I was in a rush.

[SlaycitySlayers]

Because of RonBot
I'm in last place. Laugh at me,
and I'll *bleep* your face!

QB: [img]graemlins/beer.gif[/img] Jacksonville
RB: [img]graemlins/beer.gif[/img] Indianapolis
WR: [img]graemlins/beer.gif[/img] Seattle
K: [img]graemlins/martini.gif[/img] St. Louis
TS: [img]graemlins/coffee.gif[/img] New England
TD: [img]graemlins/dog.gif[/img] Kansas City

[jz06]

QB: Colts
RB: Pats
WR: Bears
K: Colts
TS: Cowboys
TD: The withering Giants

Haiku? We got your haiku *right here*.

Eagles suck our a$$
Still won't play them never no
Redskins racist name.

[img]graemlins/kiss.gif[/img]

[mpaul]

Curses get bleeped out
The Web has porn, bizarre smut
What, you can't say "ass?"

Ahem. Here's Jeri's lineup. The Hostboard crashes her computer at work, so I'm doing the honors:

> OK. Here's my lineup for this week. I don't feel good about this, mostly because I play myself twice. Drat. Double drat.

QB: San Diego
RB: Carolina
WR: NO
KS: Carolina
TS: Jacksonville
TD: Denver

[jz06]

With all due respect to Megan, who is as beautiful as she is literal, we'll volunteer her haiku for her...

Ahem if I may
your honor the facts are these
not so much with rex

[img]graemlins/wonder.gif[/img]

[mpaul]

The Miscarriage lineup. Watch what we do here.

QB: SEA (against the Rams? Shootout, here we come!)

RB: NO (a moot point, really. Both my RBs are on teams that throw more than they run, so I'm hoping to drum up just a few more points here.)

WR: OAK! (What insanity! The Giants haven't had a 200-yard passing game in months, and with Amani Toomer out for the year and Tiki Barber having a huge season, they're not likely to. Plus, they play Chicago. The Giants, along with ATL's defense, have cost me more than a few games this year, and it's time for an upheaval. Good-bye, the Giants!)

K: Balt

TS: IND (this had better be an absolutely slaughtering in Buffalo, because my next choice is)

TD: TB (2-6 and loving it! The Falcons' defense has given up many, many points in the past few weeks, and I haven't broken 55 points in months. So I'm changing it up.)

There it is. That Oakland pick will give me negative points. You watch.

[mpaul]

> Ahem if I may
your honor the facts are these
not so much with rex

A long time ago, Rob, myself and some friend of Rob's named Shawn (Shaun? Sean? Whichever; he really liked wolves), wasted an entire day coming up with innane haikus. I think we wrote them down. They were vile and ridiculous and strange, and we laughed and laughed.

And then I went home and ate butter. Good times.

[Baldric]

Here's my trash talk to Ron's team:

"0011 0101 1011 1100 1001!"

QB: The Racists...I mean, the Redskins

RB: The murdering palefaces...I mean, the Cowboys (Actually, my official pick is Denver, but the joke doesn't work with The Broncos.)

WR: Monty Python's Flying Circus (Why not? If they're not playing, I'll take the Eagles.)

K: The Globetrotters (They can get more field goals than anybody! Even Jesus! And they're coming to Buffalo in February!! If Mike gets picky and makes us stick to football, I'll take the Vikings. The football team, not the real Vikings.)

TS: Seattle (Shoot out!)

TD: N'Orleans (Getting shot! Oy.)

[megansev]

Thanks for the haiku Jon...you and Mike think way too much alike. [img]smile.gif[/img]
My team this week is also going to see big changes, mostly b/c the Giants play da Bears and I have them as my starting TS and TD, respectively. So, here goes:
QB-STL
RB-ATL
WR-IND
K-MIA
TS-WASH, even though they're going up agst. a well-rested Philly team. yikes.
TD-CHI, hoping they are embarrassed enough after last week to stuff the Giants.
Not sure if this'll work, but we'll see.

[mpaul]

Oh, such craziness. Clearly, I'm not the only one in a silly mood today. With that in mind, here's my new lineup!

QB: The city that sorta created grunge music -- but what it really created was the pre-hipster movement, complete with people wearing flannel around their waists and accusing Courtney Love of murder. And don't get us started on the coffee!

RB: The city where you'll drown if you're black. Also, reknowned for its annual street festival, and the place where Joe Francis goes to make a fortune! Girls Gone Wild, indeed!

WR: The other city across from where the 49ers play. Lots of gangs here, for some reason. But Jason Kidd came from there, so it's all good!

K: Used to have the highest rate of syphilis in the whole country, which is funny if you think about it.

TS: Space aliens with dark, wonderful powers.

TD: Batman (Because wouldn't you?)

There you go. I don't know why, either.