Smack-Off, Round 2: Headhunter vs. Filthy McNastie

[Smackie Chan]

Good luck to both of you.

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We are many, but are we much?

[Headhunter]

Good ole' Oklahoma livin' Shheeeyooot, can't beat it!



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Rack the LINK!

[Headhunter]

Filthy McNastie, a Smack Chat Icon well known for his antics in rural Oklahoma as you?ve never seen him before, today, on behind the smack. As a young man Filthy was running with your average rural Oklahoman crowd. None too bright, rowdy, and heavy drinkers, but not too far from what one could expect in those parts of the country. Like most teens Filthy had a core group of friends who decided to start their own band. Most notable among these were Steve, who was the sound board man for the band, and the drummer Daniel Ortiz.




Desiring to be in the spotlight, young Filthy opted to play lead guitar.


Theses three would travel down roads not one of them could have predicted. As High school was winding down the trio began experimenting with different drugs and lifestyles. This would set in stone what would ultimately rock their friendship to it's very foundation. Daniel tended to be the most withdrawn of the three. Often spending days alone in his parents strom cellar. Daniel had begun experimenting with various drugs and their interactions with each other. He soon would settle on a mixture of crank and MD 20/20. Filthy and Steve seemed oblivious to what their friend was going through as they we're headed down the path to destruction as well. Redneck bars and gallons of Old Milwaukee where the daily fixes for the two. As a wiry young man, filthy often found himself on the loosing end of drunken hillbilly brawls, much to the dismay of Steve.

Steve: In those early days ole' Filth couldn't hold his liquor and would eventually wind up pissin' off some ole' boy and then it was on. He got beer muscles like no one I'd ever seen. Hell if I had a nickel for everytime I had to pull his biscuits out of the fire I wouldn't be takin' the $50 you guy's is payin me to dish dirt on mah boy. Hell one time he even done started some shit wit big larry. Now if you'd ever seen Larry you'd now jis how damned dumb he was. Larry wuz this big ole coon ass with one of them ZZTop beards. Went about 6'7" 320 and mean as a snake. He ran the local tatoo shop. Well ole filthy wuz running his fuckin mouth off and Larry had about all he wuz gonna take. Well I knew Filthy wuz about to be toast so I come runnin' up and jump over the table at Larry. Hell all I could get a hold of was that som bitches beard. So I starts pullin on it and screamin' like a banshee. Damned near pulled half his fuckin' beard off before the bouncers pulled us apart. We was damned lucky they did or we'd a been done once Larry got his bearin's.

It was incidents like the one at Big Jake's Roadhouse which would form a lifelong bond between the two, although that foundation would soon be tested.


~to be continued~

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Rack the LINK!

[This message has been edited by Headhunter (edited October 19, 2001).]

[Filthy McNastie]

Ok.

I'm in for a bit...give me a little time...

BTW...HH...I thought you were supposed to be SMACKING me...it looks like you got ahold of my journal...it's almost creepy...

L8.

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[Headhunter]

Glad to see you show up for the 4th quarter Filthy. I've got more to come but was wondering if you were going to no-show and whether to expend the energy or not.

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Rack the LINK!

[Headhunter]

We now return you too.....



As their band began to gain popularity in local dives the money started to trickle in. Little did Steve and Filthy know they would cause rough times. As hard living teens in a rural town popularity was of the utmost importance. Steve and Filthy pooled their money together to by a sports car to improve their image. The Ford F-150 just wasn?t pulling the caliber of chicks that they were hoping for.



The new car had exactly the effect that they were hoping for. Their image had improved from town ruffians to bad ass metal men. They soon came to know a young lady by the name of Maxine




Maxine had become quite a friend of the band's and had fallen for Filthy, and Filthy for her. There was trouble in paradise, however, as Steve was quite taken with the comely Maxine. As time progressed and the two fell deeper and deeper in love, Steve became more withdrawn. Taking his frustrations out in the weight room.

Steve: I figured If I could buff myself out maxine would have to fall for me, So i began juicing up and Gettin into a bunch of brawls in front of Maxine to impress her.



~to be continued~

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Rack the LINK!

[Headhunter]

We return to...



As wedding bells approaced for Filthy and Maxine, Steve became increasingly violent and one september day, he would exact his revenge on Filthy. Under the auspices of a beer bash in the woods, Steve would lure Filthy miles out of town. Once alone Steve quickly turned violent and turned on his lifelong friend.

Steve: It's not a moment I'm proud of, But I couldn't get past my feelings for maxine. The roids had increased my aggresion and I let the poor defenseless bastard have it.

Beaten down, Filthy was left in the woods that day. Naked, alone and half dead. It would be a turning point in his life.




As the war between Steve and Filthy raged and the band in ruins, Daniel took his earnings and withdrew to the same rural neighborhood where Filthy and Steve lived. He turned to the companionship of mans best friend as an outlet.

Daniel: Raising dogs just seemd natural. There was no infighting with them, and they helped fill the void in my life left between hits of crank. I had explored homosexuality for a while, but it was misguided. I didn't know what I wanted.


~when we return, Filthy and Steve reconcile and make a horrible discovery.~

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Rack the LINK!

[ace-high]

I'm sorry to interrupt - but Rack The Fuck Out Of This!

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you may delete this post now


[This message has been edited by ace-high (edited October 19, 2001).]

[Headhunter]

We now continue......



That lonely night in the woods, laying in his own feces and urine gave Filthy sometime for introspection. His days of living the life of a wanna be metal god had to be put behind him. He also need to make a honest woman out of maxine. How could he have brought Steve to this point, and how could he rebuild that friendship. With new pupose in life, Filthy began to rustle his shattered body and soul and crawl back to town. The journey of a thousand miles began with a single gut wrenching yell as his sack scaped across the barren ground. It would fortify Filthy for the years to come. Once back in town. He found Steve, and began to work on rebuilding the broken bridge of trust.

Steve: I gotta hand it to Filth, I figured he'd show up with a .45 instead of a case of Shiner. I realized that Maxine was in love with him, not me, and we began to move forward with our lives.

As the two became closer once again, Daniel was falling further into the depths of depravity. Unable to attract the attention of the local ladies daniel began with the first steps on a long dark path.

Filthy: We started noticing strange things with Daniel and his dogs, They were always playing with dildos like they were NylaBones.






Filthy:When Lover had her first litter of pups Steve and I got real suspicious. Something seemed real familiar about those pups.




~When we return, the confrontation with Daniel~


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Rack the LINK!


[This message has been edited by Headhunter (edited October 19, 2001).]

[Headhunter]

Filty: Steve and I go over to Daniels one night, and he's real distracted when he answers the door, he keeps looking back inside, so Steve and I say "What the fuck is going on in here" and force our way in. The whole room smells like anal sex, except there's noone else there. That's when we saw it.

Steve: I could believe my eyes. But there was lover. Splayed out on the floor with a fucking strap on. The ass smell wasn't from the damn dog. It was Daniel. You think Filthy got his ass kicked.




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Rack the LINK!

[This message has been edited by Headhunter (edited October 19, 2001).]