Hi Zeeshan I read your story you did fine for the most part. There are a few things I think I can help with. In the future, after you finish a story you may want to ask for someone to edit your story. Usually, I have someone go over it before I post. Editors can see things that maybe you have missed on rereading. Since English is not your first language they might be able to offers some pointers on the nuances of this complicated language. As for your story, I enjoyed it and hope you come back with a sequel. I'm not all that familiar with Afghan, Pakistan, and Indian relation, am curious. just a few things from high school and the stories from our (US) slanted media. Seems like the unrest is great for tension in a story. I'm curious, in Muslim families where the husband has more than one wife, is there a pecking order, one that dominates the others? Well 'm rambling drop me a message if you want some advice on ideas or editing. Thanks for the story GM
Inactive Member