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History Of Santa Claus: The Untold Story
1689: A Spanish-German explorer, Santa Klaus, discovers the North Pole, and
establishes a small base camp.
1691: Because of harsh and meager living conditions, Klaus' crew abandons him.
1692: Klaus is rescued by the Viking ship Hvorfor. He returns to Europe,
bringing some weapons with him crafted at the North Pole. He finds he's able to
sell them quite easily, making a small profit.
1703: Klaus saves up enough money to buy a small ship and crew, and returns to
the North Pole. Upon arriving, he finds his base camp, half-buried but
still intact.
1704: Klaus returns to Europe with a shipload of North Pole weapons, and is
successful in selling them. He makes enough profit to increase his crew,
and buys building materials to expand his polar base.
1705: Klaus returns again to the North Pole, and builds quarters for him and his
crew, and sets up the Polar Exports Company.
1716: After six shiploads of exports, the European market is flooded with polar
weapons, including the phony ones making charlatans rich. Seeing this
decline, Klaus decides to invest his money by starting a toy company in
his native Germany.
1720: Klaus Toys becomes the largest toy company in Germany, but only because of
Klaus' underhanded weapons dealings. (It was also rumored that Klaus was
dealing with enemy countries as well) Competitors urged government
officials to begin an investigation.
1721: Enough proof is found, and charges are drawn up against the Klaus Toys
Company. Klaus himself refuses to release his records.
1722: The German Supreme Court finds Klaus guilty of tax evasion and of treason.
When news of this breaks, Klaus' employees all turn against him and his
company.
1723: Klaus is exiled to Sicily, and shortly before leaving, he absconds with
all the company's funds. Klaus spends much of this year changing his
identity to evade authorities; to further mask his questionable past, he
changes his name now to 'Claus'.
1724: A search party is sent to the Mediterranean to recover the funds; however,
Claus hears of this ahead of time and he and his Sicilian wife flee for
their lives. (Some say he went into Northern Africa, but it's generally
assumed that this was only a ruse to lure the searchers off course. He's
believed to have returned to his North Pole base)
1725: Claus II is born en route to the North Pole.
1725-1734: The Claus' lay low at the North Pole. Claus teaches his son the arts
of toymaking and business dealings.
1735: Rumor has it that Claus has hired Scandinavian builders to build a castle
for him at the North Pole, making use of almost half of the company funds.
1739: The castle is finished, and is one of the largest in the world. Claus II
reaches his fifteenth birthday, and in the same year, Claus' wife dies,
accidentally falling from a balcony in one of the castle's great halls.
1740: Claus, mourning his wife, becomes increasingly ill.
1745: Santa Claus II becomes of age, and begins taking care of the castle and
of his sick father.
1747: Using the remaining company funds, Claus II builds a small city around
the castle to attract workers and craftsmen.
1748: Word of the North Pole settlement reaches Europe. The Elves of Eastern
Europe, quickly becoming political outcasts and striving for a better
life, begin immigrating in waves to the North Pole.
1753: All the elves have left Eastern Europe and have become firmly established
at the North Pole. Claus II begins his father's toy company once again,
with an estimated 30,000 elves employed. Claus I dies, at age 89.
1755: The North Pole officially becomes a nation, and Claus II and his wife take
the throne. The toy business continues to flourish, and the elves enjoy
prosperity. Claus III is born.
1757: The great stables are built, and scientists are secretly hired by Claus
II to begin an ambitious project, that of breeding and training reindeer
to fly.
1773: The flying reindeer are achieved and become Claus II and III's major form
of transportation.
1774: A mutant reindeer, named Rudolf, is born whose nose emits light. He
becomes an outcast of the reindeer society, and is taken in by the Claus
government. Claus II celebrates his 50th birthday, inviting several other
world leaders for a stay at his castle. To impress them, he displays a
lavish show of wealth, all at the elves' expense. He gives the other
leaders the impression of a dictatorship under the guise of royalty. The
elves sense this, and the seeds of rebellion are planted.
1777: As conditions become increasingly strict, the elves begin to search for a
leader to lead their revolt. Rudolf, still in favor of the Claus
government, sees their plight and begins thinking of ways to use it to his
advantage.
1784: On his 60th birthday, Claus II takes a sleigh ride down main street during
the Christmas day parade, and is assassinated by a radical faction of
elves. Claus III, now 29, takes over immediately and puts martial law
into effect for the whole North Pole. Civil war breaks out as Rudolf
leads the Elves in rebellion.
1785-1792: The Seven-year Strike happens. The elves refuse to make toys, and
the Claus Toy Company nearly goes bankrupt, as the North Pole hits an
economic low. Claus III, fearing for his life, becomes a prisoner of his
own castle. Rudolf rises to the peak of his power, and sets himself as
leader of the elven community.
1796: Rudolf and his army unsuccessfully try to invade Norway. Over 10,000 elves
are killed.
1800: Inside the castle, unbeknownst to the elves, Claus IV is born.
1802: After a string of political blunders, Rudolf senses that he's quickly
losing favor with the elves. Frosty the Snowman is built, brought to
life, and used as a political scapegoat.
1804: Frosty the Snowman is melted at a public execution, and the elves are
calmed of their unrest, for the moment.
1819-1826: After a long period of unrest, Rudolf is finally ousted, and Claus
III, aged 71, rightfully regains the throne. Prince Claus IV is
introduced to the elves publicly for the first time.
1827-1841: The Renormalization years. Claus III brings the near-bankrupt Claus
Toys Company out of dormancy and appoints his son as president. In order
to clear their bad name and make up for their out-of-the-way location,
they decide to start the hugest advertising campaign ever. Each Christmas,
Claus IV will ride throughout the world, distributing free toys to
children everywhere. The ad campaign becomes a hit, but remains very
costly.
1847: Claus III dies.
1851: As the annual ad campaign continues, deficits pile up, and the elves are
asked to work harder, longer hours and still take a pay cut. They start to
complain, but Claus assures them he'll do all he can to help them. As a
sign of goodwill, Claus IV marries an Elven wife, strengthening the bonds
between the Claus family and the Elves.
1856: Claus V is born. In order to celebrate, Claus IV decides to stay at home,
and so he suggests that department stores use costumed employees to
represent him. They do, and it works out so well that he decides to do it
every year.
1857-1867: Claus V grows up, spending most of his time visiting with his elf
relatives and friends. Claus IV, who spends most of his time building up
the company, doesn't seem to mind; in fact, he feels that it's good
publicity.
1871: Working conditions continue to worsen for the elves, and they try to
convince Claus V to overthrow his father and give the government back to
the elves.
1872: Claus V usurps his father's throne, sending him to live the remainder of
his life under guard in the castle's west wing.
1875: After reading the works of Karl Marx, Claus V chooses communism as the new
form of government for the North Pole. Some elves protest this, but they
are successfully quieted. (It's also because of communism that Santa
Claus' suit later changes from beige to red.)
1881: Claus IV dies in captivity, just as the new Government gets underway. His
funeral isn't a large one.
There is more to this story but that is for another day!
Continued HERE.
(something happened to his hat when I was starting to take the pictures. The cold must have casue it to shrink up a lil and not fit right)
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...ver/kring7.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...ver/kring5.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...ver/kring2.jpg
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v6...ver/kring3.jpg
<font color="#cd6600" size="1">[ November 15, 2004 08:22 AM: Message edited by: Guyver ]</font>
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HAHAHAHAHA!!
great read and a damn cool custom!
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excellent, did you write that? When do we get part 2? I demand to know what happens next! [img]biggrin.gif[/img]
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[img]rolleyes.gif[/img]
...that's great! [img]biggrin.gif[/img]
...but, has anyone ever told you that you have too much time on your hands. [img]wink.gif[/img]
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Right on, Guyver! I'm looking forward to the era of Claussius the Empirical Socialist Dictator!
http://208.56.45.63/sp/claussius.jpg
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Sweet!
Dig the story too! Very cool... killer custom man!
