He was always warning her not to get mixed up in the wrong crowd. After Renton, he'd made sure to keep a closer eye on her. It wasn't that she couldn't fend for herself, it was just that this little part inside her still wanted him back. She wanted him to see what he'd done to her, how he'd changed her. She relived the first time they met over and over in her head. Then watching, months and years later, from across trash littered streets, just to see what his life was like now. The baby would at least be a few years old. If he hadn't driven her back to where she came from, for the third time.
She'd let Jack come back into her life. To open up shop and leave a light on when he wasn't home. But he had his own life to live now. His own girl to watch out for. And while he'd managed to keep her on a strict diet of cookie dough and liquor, he'd never managed to fully heal her. She was still working a dead end job, shifting it every six months or so, and living in the same rundown apartment with the same fifteen inch black and white tv, and the same cat, and the same heater she used to slip boys shoes under. It all held these same memories. And maybe that was why it was so hard to move on. Maybe it was time for a little change of scenery. Time to finally move on with her life and leave the skeletons in the closet on the way.
Maybe she just needed something new. Something to return her to where she was before everything turned itself upside down. She just couldn't put her finger on what that shiny new thing should be.
http://tinypic.com/ozfaw
<font color="#996600" size="1">[ November 28, 2004 03:12 PM: Message edited by: new york avenue ]</font>
