I wrote this for my English Class at School, and thought I would share it with you all.
As Psalm 62:1-2 says, ?My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, he is my fortress. I will never be shaken.? Psalm 62 reminds me that though I may be presented with obstacles in my spiritual journey, with God on my side, ?I will never be shaken,? and that is a wonderful reminder.
In August of 2006 I went with my youth group on a mission trip to Mexico. Having been told of the poverty of other lands, in Mexico I came face to face with this poverty. What shocked me was how happy the people are! I am constantly wanting more? the latest cd?s, movies, and other luxuries. The Mexican people don?t have these luxuries, and they seem content. It made me realize that if I had to live somewhere without them, I could be just as happy as the Mexicans. I am reminded that I only need Jesus and I can be perfectly satisfied with Him.
Another experience I had in Mexico was with a little girl named Maria. She was only nine years old. Communicating in broken Spanish on the last day there, I asked her, ?Do you want a Bible?? Her face lit up, and I will never forget the expression on her face. Seeing her happiness to receive a Bible was a humbling experience. When I was little and got my first Bible, certainly I was excited, but it wasn?t as special to me because my Church had Bibles in every pew and our home had them in abundance as well. Though this Bible was my own, I took it for granted. Maria?s joy really opened my eyes, and it is something that I will carry with me the rest of my life. John 3:16 says, ?for God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believes in him shall not perish, but have eternal life.? In giving Maria a Bible also offered her this gift of ?eternal life.?
Another experience that strongly impacted me was when I was about seven years old. My Uncle Ivan and Aunt Muriel were visiting, and Uncle Ivan was pushing me on the swing. We were casually chatting, when I asked him, ?Are you a Christian?? He replied, ?No, I?m not.? After hearing his response, I went silent. I didn?t understand how you could not be a Christian. All my friends were from church, so they were Christians. My closest relatives were also Christians. ?How could someone not know God?? I wondered. What really surprised me most was the way he said it. It was as if he didn?t care, and it was no big deal to him one way or the other. I had never met someone like that, and it was really my first experience of realizing that not everyone in the world knows Christ. Looking back on this, I recalled a sermon preached by my pastor on the book of Daniel. We learn that, despite Darius? decree, Daniel continued praying to the Lord, risking his life. Though my life was not threatened, my faith was challenged. I wondered at Uncle Ivan?s response, but still remained strong with the Lord, not altering my practices because of what my uncle had said. In John Bunyan?s hymn Who Would True Valor See, we read, ?there?s no discouragement, shall make him once relent, his first avowed intent, to be a pilgrim.? Though discouragements arise, I still progress on in my spiritual journey and continue ?to be a pilgrim.?
Of all the books I have read, one that has made a significant impression on me is Through Gates of Splendor. It is striking that the five men risked their lives going to Auca Indians, doing it so that even one might be saved. I wonder if I could ever be that brave? going to a foreign land, risking my life so that one person might hear the Gospel, and not even necessarily believe. This story encourages me to live for the Lord and not for myself. Another book I?ve read is With God in a POW Camp about a man who is tortured unbearably during the Vietnam War. Although they are forced to silence, the men in the camp conduct ?worship services? with each other, and they even would whistle The Lord?s My Shepherd throughout the camp. It?s an amazing example of a man who, though in prison and being tortured unmercifully, still stayed strong in the Lord and didn?t question why the Lord had put him in this camp. His strength reminded me of the passage of Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." He made the best of his time in prison and seemed to know that this was God?s plan for him.
Looking through my old sermon notes, I was reminded of points that impressed me in some sermons. My pastor preached on James 1:13-14, and within that passage we learn that Jesus doesn?t even know when the day of judgement will be. That reminded me that Jesus really is the son of God, but born of the virgin Mary with a human nature. Therefore showing Christ?s human side. Another sermon that was a comforting reassurance was a youth pastor speaking from Mark 2:13-17, describing the three ways Jesus demonstrates his redemption. First, Jesus summons sinners. Second, Jesus refreshes sinners. Third, Jesus restores sinners. It was a good reminder of how we are first called, then Jesus will restore us to him by cleansing away our sins.
Working at a Funeral Home, I see people whose loved ones have just passed away, and so many of them have no hope of seeing them in heaven. I have noticed in the programs for services, many commonly say, ?we will see them in heaven,? or ?they are in a far greater place,? but I wonder how many of these are true. Are those words just put there because they are comforting at times of death? Or are they really the truth? I want to live a worthy Christian life, so that when my family is making plans for my funeral, they can put something like that on my program knowing with certainty that they will see me in glory.
I also remember when my Grandma died in June of 2004. I had known for a long time that she was near death, but when she died it didn?t seem real. Nobody so close to me had ever died before, and I was across the United States when I received the news. At first I was hurt that God would take my Grandma away, especially when I wasn?t even there her last days. But then, I was reminded that because I know she believed in Jesus Christ, I will see my Grandma again in heaven. That gave me a renewed strength, knowing that because Jesus died on the cross for our sins, we have that hope of eternal life in heaven.
Another occasion bringing me closer to God was my friendship with Amy. She had been living with her aunt and uncle, but was now going to move away to live with her dad in Indonesia. When she just randomly told me one day, ?I?m moving to Indonesia to live with my dad and stepmom,? I didn?t understand. She had never had a good relationship with him, and now she wanted to move halfway across the world from the friends and family who loved her. What made it worse for me was the conversation that followed.
?Why are you leaving?? I asked. ?Why do you want to leave all your friends??
?Because it will be better for me to leave, especially when I?m not wanted.?
?Not wanted?? I replied, ?Of course you?re wanted; we all love you.?
?No, my aunt and uncle hate me; they don?t love me at all; they want me to leave.?
?That?s not true; they love you so much. Why else would they pay a ton of money to send you to School here? Why else would your aunt have taught you math all summer so you would be up to speed? Did she do this because she hated you? No! She did it because she loves you.?
?No, that?s just what it looks like to you, my aunt and uncle are putting on a facade, but at home they are completely different.?
In spite of our conversation, she eventually did leave for Indonesia. We maintained email correspondence, but all she ever sent were chain emails, some of which had unpleasant things in them. Then this past summer she came back. I have only seen her twice since she came back, but they have not been pleasant encounters. She lied to me, and did not act as a good friend would, when all I did was try to help. She created pain that will take a long time to fully heal. Though I still struggle against bitterness for what she did, I know that I must forgive her. My ordeal with Amy reminded me as Job 42:4 says, ?I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted.? I realize that whatever the outcome, it is His will, he knows exactly what will happen. I don?t need to understand God?s ways to trust Him.
Throughout my life, I have been reminded how wonderful it is to have a loving, forgiving God. Even though I don?t deserve his love and forgiveness, he still sent his son to die for my sins, and that is truly the greatest gift in the whole world.
