Help explaining love of AG to dh

From another thread, but relevant to this one:

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Originally posted by Skittl1321:
Nope. I have never slept with an AG, even when I was a kid. Now I think my husband would think I was on crack.

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<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">I think my husband DOES think I'm on something. He just doesn't at all "get" this new fascination I have with the AG. I get very weird looks when he comes to bed and I am reading Meet . . . .

I don't even really understand this, except that I like the products, I like sharing them with my 7yo. . . .

Any thoughts would be appreciated!

My husband has a salt water fishtank. He wants a big TV. He is planning to buy a Corvette (Why? The World's most impractical car, right?). He likes power tools, but he never uses them.

I just explain AG and baskets to him in the context of his wants/desires. So far he is doing ok, other than he thinks it's just a passing fad. Little does he know . . .

My FIL is a model train collector, so my addiction is accepted quite readily with DH and his family. I guess I'm really fortunate. The other day, DH had the catalog I had marked up (check mark=have this, NO=don't want it, *=really want it). On the spread with Addy, Kirsten, Josefina and Kaya, there are no checkmarks. He said, "You don't have any of these dolls?" When I said no, he asked how much it would be for all four, and then responded, "So if I got you this [places hands over both pages of the spread] for Christmas, would you be happy?"

Four AGs for Christmas?!?!? Are you kidding?

My husband thinks the collection is a little weird. But he spends a fortune on bicycles and bike racing. I tell him it?s a collection that I really enjoy. I enjoyed it when I was a kid and never grew out of it. I love the history and the stories which is why I am more attached to these dolls than the other dolls I collect. I don?t play with my dolls, but I do read the books occasionally. (And I don?t have a daughter.) Tell him that for now it is a way you can connect with your daughter, but down the road it may become a stress reliever or just an escape for you. And everyone deserves one of those.

It is an expensive collection, but most things that people collect are expensive. At least there is play value with your daughter for this. It could be a collection of antique teapots or silver spoons. You didn?t say much other than how to explain, but remember in marriage you are equals. He shouldn?t make you feel bad about your hobby or your spending on the hobby. (If it becomes a financial burden, then discuss what can reasonably be spent on AGs but make sure that his collections are also discussed. It?s a partnership.) You can try to explain, but don?t feel you need to. In marriage everyone needs their own interest.

Quote:

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Originally posted by jrtmom3274:
My FIL is a model train collector, so my addiction is accepted quite readily with DH and his family. I guess I'm really fortunate. The other day, DH had the catalog I had marked up (check mark=have this, NO=don't want it, *=really want it). On the spread with Addy, Kirsten, Josefina and Kaya, there are no checkmarks. He said, "You don't have any of these dolls?" When I said no, he asked how much it would be for all four, and then responded, "So if I got you this [places hands over both pages of the spread] for Christmas, would you be happy?"

Four AGs for Christmas?!?!? Are you kidding?

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<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">I assume you said yes...If not, the rest of us are coming to hunt you down.

Just tell him "If I have to explain it to you, you'd never understand." [img]biggrin.gif[/img]

Actually, you can explain how you really feel a connection to the deep-down wholesomeness and the message of one's American heritage that is tied in to this line of historically accurate, heirloom-quality dolls.

(Wow, maybe I should get a job with AG's PR department!) [img]biggrin.gif[/img] [img]biggrin.gif[/img] [img]biggrin.gif[/img] Good luck trying to explain the unexplainable to your DH!

(Mine just thinks I've gone barking mad, and smiles tolerantly, but condescendingly) [img]graemlins/whatever.gif[/img]

Robin--yes, yes, I think you get it. I don't even know what my attraction is, but that seems to sum it up.

Addressing some of the other posts--skittl1321, I think that part of his "fear" is the $$, but hopefully I can manage not to go outside our budget with this.

And he doesn't have any collections and he is not a big spender--especially on himself. In fact, he chooses to spend our discretionary cash on things for us--like a nice dinner out for my bday or our anniversary, or a vacation for us or the family, etc.

So, yes, I guess that I think that if he understands my interest he will be more supportive of the $$ it will take to support it, but I also don't want him to think I've gone over the edge. . . .

I feel lucky that I'm going into whatever new relationship comes my way (cross your fingers for me girlies! I'm soooo tired of the dating scene!) with my doll obsession, model horse obsession and vintage 80's toys obsession.

My father doesn't collect anything, and he and my Mom are on a retired budget, but she's going to start collecting Boyds Bears with his support all the way. He got my mother a credit card and budgets a certain amount of payment on it a month. May that would be a good solution for finicial woes with collecting?

Another suggestion I have, is why not learn a craft you could sell to make collection money? I'm taking my love of cross-stitching and turning into an embroidery business (and boy does it go faster on machine! lol) that I hope within five years to be making the money I made at my former factory job. It's not easy, but with little pluck and alot of talent, there's a whole world of e-business out there to jump into. [img]smile.gif[/img]

I don't have a DH (or even a DBF----what is the acronym for boyfriend? hehe, anyways...) but I have decided I just don't care if people know I collect AG and I've been better off for it. I leave my dolls out when friends come over and no one ever seems to mind. In fact, this past summer one of my friends even said that she loves her Kirsten that she had when she was a girl, and another girl said that dolls freak her out but "the accessories are cool." For a short time a few weeks ago I had a boyfriend and he never said a word when Kit would be sitting out when he'd come over. Of course, he still builds things with Legos and I never said a word about that... [img]wink.gif[/img] This is to everyone: from my experience, I think you should just be straightforward and don't make excuses or apologize and I don't think anyone will ever think less of you for it! If they do... well, they'll have us to answer to! [img]mad.gif[/img] [img]biggrin.gif[/img]

I think for me, once my family and boyfriend saw how how happy my collection makes me, they just accepted it and got over it. My parents thought my obsession was silly and too expensive at first, but now they buy me doll stuff for holidays and my mom loves to see the clothes I make for them. My boyfriend laughs and calls me a dork when I get excited about my dolls or when I get something new for them, but he also is genuinely happy that I'm so happy about them, if that makes sense. Even though he teases me sometimes, he also does wonderful things for the dolls. He buys little things for them every now and then, and once when I was away for the weekend he even figured out how to use my sewing machine and made a patchwork pillow for them as a surprise! I think most husbands/boyfriends come around in time, and will respect your collection because it is important to you, even if they don't understand it. At least, that's what they SHOULD do. [img]graemlins/sun.gif[/img]