when all hate is gone

when all hate is gone
(for Fred Neil)

i.
my father's best friend
introduced you to me
on the flip side of Phil Ochs's
"I Ain't Marchin Anymore".
it was like a light
exploding in my head, like
someone finally showed me
the way. yours has endured
as the voice beckoning me
every time i pick up
a guitar.

ii.
i found myself searching for you
only to find that you
died on Monday. i was in Bloomington
at the time, wandering between
bars, walking down lonely
streets, making music
with my footsteps. i remember thinking
about heroes, and how the only heroes
i've ever had died too early--
except for you. and you,
grandfather of everything i wanted to be,
you stepped back
from the spotlight,
turned around, and went
back home. i couldn't think
of a more fitting hero
for a girl like me
to have.

iii.
i listen to you
as i drive through the Midwestern hills
that surround the town
i live in. i listen to you
as i write this. i sing your words
to myself as i
fall asleep at night. i have found
my voice through yours
and now turn to make
my own way,
my own voice. i miss
your guidance already.

iv.
i know that peace will return
when all hate is gone. tonight is
bittersweet--i know you found
what you were looking for, and i know
you found the courage to
let it all go. i know that
your voice has never sounded
so close and yet so far away
as it does in my ears
on this clear summer night.

-g