Who here owns a Rolex?

Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

You have a rolex...we have friends....whos the cunt?

yeah, pity he doesn't know how to tell the time

or when to shut up....

I own a polex, it's made out of the polish peoples bones who got killed in the german gas chanbers in world war two.

Shits on yours, what's it made out of? Shitty gold and crappy diamonds.

Yes it fucking well is, 24K Gold to be exact!
Bow down to this loaded motherfucker!

Or how to tie his shoelaces.

or how to instigate an intelligent conversation....

Hmm no, but my mum bought one the other day.

I can't say I'm that keen on them, they are kinda tacky and cheesy if you know what I mean.

*Disclaimer: I do not for one second believe that you actually own a genuine Rolex, but let's not see this turn into a "have not, have too" arguement.

Why would you want one anyway? You can buy watches that do the same thing for a tenner off the market, probably.