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just visited this site were I saw some ugly drummer jokes... Here are 3 of the ugliest I read...
Q: how do you know when a drummer is knocking at your door?
A: When he doesn't know when to come in.
another answer: when the knocks keeps gettin faster and slower
Q: why are drummers stupid?
A: because they only know how to count from 1 to 4.
Q: How do you make a drummer slow down?
A: Put sheets of music in front of him.
Q: How do you make him stop?
A: Put notes on it!
[img]eek.gif[/img] sorry guys!!! [img]graemlins/whatever.gif[/img]
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Funny [img]tongue.gif[/img]
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How do you know if the drum riser is level?
When the drool is coming out from both sides of the drummers mouth.
Ah well, I tried.
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Q: What do you call a drummer with no girlfriend?
A: Homeless!!
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We did a slew of these a few yrs back.
Most of you have heard these 100 times, but for those who may not have, here goes...
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How do you make a drummers' car aerodynamically correct?
Answer 1: Take the Pizza Hut sign off the roof.
Answer 2: Really?! He owns a car?! Is it paid for?
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What do you do when a drummer [musician, actor, comedian] knocks on your front door?
Give him the money & take the pizza.
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3 people pass on & are met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter.
Peter, as part of 'entry into Heaven' quiz [img]wink.gif[/img] ," asks the 1st guy, "How much income were you earning when you passed away?" To which he replies, "3.2 million." Peter replies, "Oh, you must've been a CEO of a major company," to which the guy replies, "yes."
Peter asks the 2nd guy the same question. "300,000" was his response. "You must've been a head surgeon," Peter says, to which he replies, "yes."
The 3rd guy steps up & says out loud, "7,480."
Peter retorts, "Yeah?! What instrument did you play?" [img]graemlins/sure.gif[/img]
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What's the difference between a dead frog in the road & a dead tuba player?
The frog was on his way to a [paying] gig.
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What's the definition of "perfect pitch?"
Tossing a trumpet/trombone/tuba/fiddle/juice harp/accordion/electric gtr/Kenny G's sax into the toilet without hitting the rim of the bowl.
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An accordion player stopped at the grocery store on the way back from band rehearsal [img]wink.gif[/img] to pick up a few things. Upon entering the store he realized that he had left his instrument uncased & uncovered in the back seat, exposed in plain view. Panicking, he runs back outside towards the car & notices the back window busted out. Fearing the worst, he runs up to the car & looks through the broken window & into the back seat...where he is surprised to see a second accordion. [img]tongue.gif[/img]
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OK, this one may be a little risque, but in the name of levity, here goes:
What did the strip club dancer do to her arse hole before she went to work?
...Dropped him off at band practice.
<font color="#a62a2a" size="1">[ September 13, 2004 12:32 AM: Message edited by: FuseU1 ]</font>
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Q: what do you call a guy who hangs out with a bunch of musicians?
A: a drummer
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I heard a different variation on the drummer knocking on the door. It is:
Q: How do you know when a female vocalist is knocking on your door?
A: Because she doesn't know what key to use or when to come in.
Had to flip that around [img]wink.gif[/img]
Q: Did you hear about the band that locked their keys in their van while in the Guitar Center parking lot?
A: Yeah, it took them an hour to get the drummer out!
Ouch [img]rolleyes.gif[/img]
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LOL!!! [img]graemlins/cry_smile.gif[/img]
OUCH!!! [img]eek.gif[/img]
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I got a good one for ya!
Q. Why did the guitarist put drumsticks in the dashboard of his car?
A. So he could park in handicap spots
hope you like
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Q. Whats the difference between a Pizza and a musician?
A. The pizza can feed a family of 4
[img]biggrin.gif[/img]
