Just keep building off what I say:
Mystique swoops down from Death Star with gun in hand.
*In best James Earl Jones voice*
Mystique: Kurt, I am your Mother..."
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But mommy, do I really need a signature?"
Printable View
Just keep building off what I say:
Mystique swoops down from Death Star with gun in hand.
*In best James Earl Jones voice*
Mystique: Kurt, I am your Mother..."
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But mommy, do I really need a signature?"
Hey lotusson WELCOME--Im glad you decided to join us! http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/wink.gif
Uhh....Kurt finding out Graydon is his brother and he wanting him dead?
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~`~`~`Dragonlady`~`~`~
*Kurt sighs*
Kurt:"Im not sure I like your sense of humor Mystique"
Mystique:"Sorry.Seriously though I AM your mother,but your right,Logan ISNT your father.......SABRETOOTH is!"
------------------
~`~`~`Dragonlady`~`~`~
*Kurt shakes his head as if he was trying to wake from a bad dream*
Kurt:"I....."
*Kurt composes himself and sighs*
Kurt:"I guess Ive always sensed the truth about you,but I didnt want to accept it.I was in denial.BUT SABRETOOTH my father?.....I wouldnt have guessed it in a million years....."
*Mystique sighs*
Mystique:"Well he....isnt....your father....."
Kurt:"WHAT?!?!Well WHO then???"
*Again Mystique sighs then averts her eyes from Kurts*
Mystique:*ahem*"It was the milk man....."
Kurt:"The....milk....man???"
*Kurt stands there puzzled*
Kurt:"I cant see you having a milk man.....and did they still even have mil--"
Mystique:"OH I see!Big bad Mystique one of the X-Mens greatest villians cant have a milk man!Is that it?!Im human too you know!...."
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I know this was whaky but I couldnt help myself. http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/wink.gif
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~`~`~`Dragonlady`~`~`~
LOL!!
Mystique swoops down from Death Star with gun in hand.
*In best James Earl Jones voice*
Mystique: Kurt, I am your Mother..."
Kurt replies, "Right! And Wolverine is my father..."
Mystique: "How'd you guess?"
BamfKat
"What was that smell?"
LOL, LOL, LOL! Drags, you out do yourself!! http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/smile.gif
Milk man? you mean that dude on the Marvel 'Got Milk' commercial? Lol http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/biggrin.gif
LOL!
I want to read more! I want to read more!
[originally posted by Rex Luscus (on Exiles#3): **Nocturne get to talk to her dad?**]
[originally posted by Spatula Gal: **This is what I think will happen: she'll have to fight Nightcrawler!** **and while they're fighting, Kurt will tell her that her mother was the maillady**]
Ok, you guys, I put these ideas together for you guys to see how it came out (tell me what you think, Spats). Here it goes:
TJ: (to self)Oh, well, here goes nuthin'. (To NC) Hi daddy!
NC: Dad-... who, Me? What?!? Really?... How?!?
TJ: What do you mean how? How else?
NC: Nein, I mean with who... Uhm, oh oh...
TJ: What's the problem?
NC: (to self) Man! now I'm sure I'm Mystique's. Must've inherited the tendency...
TJ: What tendency?
NC: Uhm, 'Daughter', hon ... it was the mail
lady.
TJ: What?! ...Ooooh, that's it, now I'm depressed! ... Fine then! It's settled, I'm going out with the bag boy at Wal-mart!
OOhh, just came up with this, makes no sense but just had to share! http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/wink.gif
TJ: (as is leaving and Wolverine comes in) Oh, bye Uncle Logan!
Wolverine: Huh? Yeah... (to NC) Ya see bud, that's why I stayed single...
NC: Really?
Wolverine: Yeah (sniffs air) eh, uhm, bud, gotta tell ya: I'm leaving the X-Men again fer 'nother "bit of unfinished business" trip.
NC: Again?... NOW!?!
(Wolverine breaks into a run, a mob appears in the horizon, opposite where he's going)
NC: Who the-? ... Friends of Humanity? Weapon X troops? (looks again as group nears) ... Nein! A bunch o' kids?!
(one kid of the group steps up as they arrive)
Kid: Hi, what's your name?
NC: Uhm, uh, Kurt...
Kid: Was that girl your daughter?
NC: Ja, well, I guess...
Kid: Did she call that short, hairy guy "Uncle Logan"?
NC: Ja...Why?
Kid mob (elated in their discovery and in unison): Yeee-peeee! UNCLE KURT!!!!
LOL!! This stuff is great! I think we've got a great fanfic brewing here!
deffinively!!
LOL
this is very funny
http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/smile.gif http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/smile.gif http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/smile.gif http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/smile.gif
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give a kiss tall and dark bamfsome!!!
triple-LOL!
More, more, more!
Oder:
Mehr, mehr, mehr!
Ja, immer doch ja mehr!
Wir wollen ganz mehr -
Ja, bestimmt, das wollen wir...
Mehr, mehr, mehr!
[Guys, please tell me what you think ok? You really like this Spats? Please, add, edit, subtract, divide, something, whatever, ok? You've got really great ideas Spats, you know! I really like 'em, problem is now they got me started and I have been apologizing to the Wolverine in my head since I posted this, but oh, hell, I just came up with a tid bit more...guess I'll just have to keep apologizing.]
Kid (once they have all settled): Uhm, Uncle Kurt, vhy is he(points to direction of Wolverine, whose shadow has now disappeared in the dusk of the horizon...) alvays running??
NC: Uhm, oh, ah...he uh, he uh ... (to self)stayed single too long...(to kids) I mean, hey! wanna see something neat, kids?
(nervously trying to come up with something to distract them, unconsciously begins twitching his tail...one of the smaller kids sees Kurt's tail flick)
2nd Kid: Aaaahhh!!! . . . SSSNAKE!!! . . . VE 'AVE TU SAVE UNCLE KURT! ... ATTTAAAACKKK!!
[... *I'm sorry Logan! I'm sorry! Oh, no! You too Kurt! I'm sorry Kurt! I'm so sorry! Don't worry, I'll think of something! I promise, I will!*]
LOL! I can see Nighty's face. And, oh, this reminds me of Lockheed's love for our Elf's little tail... And don't be sorry for Wolvie - you know, he's the best there is at what he does. http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/wink.gif
Love it Nghcrwlr!! Can't think of anything myself right now though...
["the best at what he does"? DITTO! Though I went nuts and mustered something up...had to save Kurt's tail! Here goes]
--------
meanwhile...
Mystique(to self): Uh, oh, Dick! My darling! Where are you?! Ooooh, how I miss the way you would hold up the milk bottles for me at the door!!!!
TJ(perplexed at the wails of Mystique, comes from behind): Uhm, hey! what's wrong?
Mystique(looks up at the sky, her back still to TJ): Ooooh! This is humiliating!!...Why?! I tell you? Why can't 'I' have a milkman?!...Why?! Where's the harm?!...Oh, and the janitor! him too (to self, though too loud) Ha!, that bastard Sabertooth, if he only knew!!
TJ: GRANDMA!! You mean, the milkman AND the janitor?!
Mystique: Yeah, I'm real talented, aren't I?...Wait! Did...you just...call...me...(as whirls around) G-R-A-N-D-M-A --? . . . NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! (breaks into a run, tearing hair)
TJ(to reader): You people better write about someone else's dysfunctional family, 'cause I'm not gonna take this anymore...(stomps off)
--------
(Mystique arrives to the scene...the mob of children running from one spot to the other, Kurt clutching on to his tail, 'porting from spot to spot, terrified at the concept there is no where to hide...)
NC: C'mon, children, we can all play nice now!... No, no, no...it's not a snake, it's a tail, NOoOoOo!... c'mon, bitte??? (to self:*think of something Kurt*)...Uhm, uh, you know daddy wants you all to play nice?...(*hopefully*)
Mystique: Dad--?... WHAT?!
(everyone halts)
*
*
*
SILENCE
*
*
(both simultaneously)
Kids: Aaaaaaaaaaah!!...It's a witch! forget it, RUN!
Mystique: Aaaaaaaaaaah!!...Grand-children! (shivers)
(as children run away, NC turns to Mystique)
NC: Uhm, mother??...
Mystique(interrupting, approaches him): Shut up! Ok? Just don't...say...a...word! You are coming with me!!
NC: What?! Aren't you a bit late to say that?...Ouch!
(Mystique pulls him by the ear...and won't let go)
NC: What are you doing? Where are you takin me?
Mystique: That's IT! I've had it!... I'm taking you to the Convent! ...you're gonna be a priest.
NC: The conv--? Aww man, do I have to? Why?
Mystique: 'CAUSE I SAY SO!
NC: Ok, ok, ok, ok!... (to self) witch...
[...and had to find someone to blame for Kurt's priest gig! http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/wink.gif ]
LMAO!!!! http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/biggrin.gif
Keep it up.. and to parry, gnahrf:
Mehr, mehr, mehr!!!
(Oh, how I love this board. http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/wink.gif )
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~*The Hiding-Crawler*~
===={::??@m??::}====
Always watching from the shadows...
LOL! *Thunderous laughter fills my room* Phantastisch! Verr?ckt! Unglaublich!
Poor Mystique! To think she has soooo many grand children - what a horror. You mustn't drive her insane, she's Nighty's mother after all...
This is getting interesting... *Hmmm* You want us to participate? Well, since you ask so humbly. But be aware everyone, none the less how much I do not pretend to be a writer, I'm still not one, and I'm not good at speaking English either. Still I wish to try this out, but I'll take one loose end and, well, you'll see... Just don't kill me too slowly for destroying this thread!
A hoarsh grumbling sounds the air as the man called Wolverine sprints through the open terrain. "Darn all these small brats," he spits out, while searching for some place to hide, "and how could they in the first place find me here? And all of them at once? Darn!" He deliberately threw away the question, if these indeed were all of them.
His eyes sweepe the sorroundings, but it isn't really necessary as he already had smelled that his pursuit, of some strange reason, had stopped. He doesn't complain, neither rejoice, but keeps running. Away from this awful lot of small bastards. Now on a closer thought, didn't some of them look quite compact, and some of them seemed too hairy for such small kids. Grumble. What had he done to deserve all this?
[ **she's Nighty's mother after all...** Yeah, but she's pretty cold-hearted...how could've she thrown him, such a cute lil babe, away then??!! I couldn't have done it! But then, let me stop ranting and raving. You people, please come up with something too? Bitte? I have been reeling and have even come up with THREE MORE little samples to continue this (all today in less than 30 minutes), I'm burning out here! Maybe after I see "American Pie 2"... http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/smile.gif Besides, things are always better when there's more than one head working on this. Gnahrf, I have a plan, but I need you all's to participate? Let me know... Oh, wait! I feel like taking out my frustrations on a villain I really love to hate, excuse me for a minute...]
TJ: So granny...
Mystique: Don't call me that!
TJ: Ok, ok, ok...Cheez, alright! I don't wanna be a nun... So, where was I? Oh, I was wondering...wasn't it risky, you know, playing Sabey with a janitor?
Mystique: Risky?! Oh, hon...let me put it to you this way. Sabe was sooo insensitive ... and sooo dull! I swear--(trails off in indignation and dissappointment) ... Uh!... Now Bob, he was another case...Risky, maybe, but it was definetly worth it...Oh, baby, how he swept!! and when --
TJ: Awwwwhhh!! Man!...PLEASE! NO! I didn't ask for, and I don't want to hear, details, Grandma!!!!
Mystique: I ... told you... to quit ...calling me that... (whiny)Besides, you started it!!!
[uh,oh! had to be careful there, the rating almost sky-rocketed! Ha! There! Now I'm being nice to Mystique a lil bit...at least she's got better tastes now! http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/wink.gif ]
More! More! This is sooooo funny! I can picture poor Wolverine with a horde of stampeding brats trailing along behind him, and Mystique, shuddering in horror at the prospect of being Gramma Mystique. Affairs with the milk and mail man? Ooooo, Sabertooth must've been a real jerk! Kurt and the mail lady! LOL! T.J. and the bag boy? Why not? He can roadie for the Butt Monkeys in his spare time! Keep writing!
------------------
Goddess in progress.....
[THANK YOU, GNAHRF! You're good...Now look: ]
**What had he done to deserve all this?**
Suddenly, Wolve halted. A new scent. Actually, a couple. Someone was near, watching.
"Ah, ha!! YOU!! You are behind all of this! You know who put me here! Tell me, who?! 'fess up, bub! ...an' tell me who decided to make those terrors from hell so hairy?!!"
(peeking out from the brush, puppy-eyed)"Who me? Aww, the hairy thing wasn't my idea...I just put them there ... the hairy part came from him (points at gnahrf), though it makes sense you know -- "
"AAAAARRRRRR!!!!" (Wolve pounces, but misses as spookyspice sticks her foot out and trips him.)
Nghtcrwlr to gnahrf: "Quick!! Call the brat troops while I stick NC in the scene long enough to delay!!"
-----
NC: Uhm, what am I doing here?
Wolve: Dunno. Popping up in places seems to be some thing you do lots of...(notices NC's priest collar) There a story behind this?
NC: Oh, this, ahum, ah, 'mother' got me into it.
Wolve: Why'd she do THAT?
NC: BECAUSE you're single...*BUDDY*
W: Uh, yeah, sure...(*boy they mess you up in there, don't they?*)
NC: At least you learn a lot in the church, though. Have you ever heard of avenging, demon-like angels that come to sinning souls at night?...
-----
"Now! Make your move!!" http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/wink.gif
muahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!
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give a kiss tall and dark bamfsome!!!
**muahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!**
NC: Uhm, did you hear something, mein freund?
Wolve: We're sorrounded, bud... maybe we should make a run for it...
NC: A 'run for it'! Sheez, what's gotten into you?!...It's those kiddies, isn't it? You think their involved? ... Ha! YOU ARE SCARED!! Admit it!!
Wolve: Naw I'm not!!!!
NC: Are too!!
Wolve: Am not!!!
NC: Are too!!
Wolve: Grrrrrr! AM NOT!!!
NC: Ok, ok, ok...hey, is that them?
(Wolve breaks into a run)
NC: Hey! Wait!!! Hold a minute!! Where are you going?! ...I was just kidding!!!
[Purrfect! Now someone add something more, dialogue, another scene, a comment, a tie in from another open end...and remember, we are making this awkward and with NO limits (*hint, hint, ahem, ahem*)]
L...M...A...O!!!!
You guys are crazy....I love it! keep it coming!
http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/biggrin.gif
BAMF!
(stops in his tracks, NC rams into him, but Wolve barely notices...snifs the air intently)
Wolve: Hmm, hold it! I smell something else...I'm following it!
NC: Wait! What is it? Where are you going?
Wolve: I gotta go for it! It smells...good!
(Wolve jumps off this thread and breaks for it, NC follows)
NC: Great, first he gets me 'grounded,' now we're fugitives of hostboard!...
[he,he,he...let's see if any of you can figure out where their going and get them back here! http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/wink.gif]
Yay! Love it, gimme more!
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"The red lights are flashing, but on this ship that could mean anything from 'We're under attack' to 'The baked potatoes are done.'"
Nghtcrwlr bring Nighty back! I've got a strange mind, and I don't like what my mind can picture Nighty in, in a wedding party. Oh, certainly not! Bring him back! Bringen Sie ihn zur?ck, bitte?
[ LOL... http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/smile.gif hey, don't break down on me, mein freund. Note I wrote "temporarily" over there! http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/wink.gif Besides, this place has soo much potential (*evil grin*)...]
(NC enters back into the thread, dragging Wolve by the ear)
NC: I have never been more embarrassed by you in my life. You ran away towards the smell of FOOD!! And you realize how rude you were to the lady?! ...can't you STOP being yourself for at least a moment?
Wolve(whiny, mouth covered in cheese): But the fondue was good! ...
[Now about how you pictured Nighty dressed in a wedding party...why don't you share with us, gnahrf, a scene? http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/wink.gif ]
Uhm... Well, I don't remember all my mind got Nightcrawler into, but, what the heck?, I'll tell you something of it. Just not to destroy this lovely tale, I say this little picture is from another continuity. A picture. (You know, you grab a camera, shoot something, developes the film, and draws a painting based on the photograph...) http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/wink.gif Well here it is, the picture.
The lovely cake. It isn't that lovely anymore, hardly lovely at all. Not with half on the floor and a blue tail sticking out from one side. Certainly, you could call the vision spectacular, funny or well focused - but the first word that springs to mind is smeary. Definitely smeary.
If you were to take a closer look, you would see yellow eyes lying in the middle of the cake. If you further were to take an even closer look, on the section with the eyes, contures to a well shaped head would be formed. The feautures of the head though, can not be seen because of all the whipped cream. Well, let me guide your gaze a wee bit upward - and to the left! Do you see something out of place there? Yes, indeed it's cheese. Now, walk away a few steps, and take a new look - don't look at the details this time, look at that strange creature at the top of the cake (*hrrm* or what, what was the top of the cake).
Don't you recognise him? Oh, he has some fondue all over his face, and all that grease in his facial hair - where can that have come from? You recognise him now? Good. Yes, Logan does look a bit undignified, I agree. But wouldn't you also, after having jumped at the elf, who just was 'tasting' a little of cake... Of course, that was after Herr Logan had ventured in to the kitchen, and after he had run for the fondue (then just being served at the tables). By the way, don't you wonder who had to dish all those jars of fondue? I do.
Now, look at all the guests. Are they terriefied at what beings have infested their party? No. Are they surprised? Yes. Do they have cream all over their bodies? Oh, yes, indeed! Let's leave the guests.
You remember those two mutants in the cake? Anyway, the cake doesn't look very big, does it? I mean, especially after the most of it is elsewhere. Did you ponder that Kurt might have it a bit squeezy down there on the bottom? He has. Would you like to be sitten on your head by that stubby candy freak? Look close at those yellow eyes again, don't they seem to be popping out of their sockets? If you could see behind the whipped, fluffy white stuff, wouldn't Kurt look very perplexed and out of breath? Very displeased of his current situation? Ja, he would.
I'm sorry for your alternate self, Slart! Who would want to have their cake ruined? But, oh, perhaps it wasn't an alternate you? (Just remembered something you said, I'll go and get it!)
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Slartibartfast:
Danke, Bamf. Yup, we had the cover of the new Defenders on the cake. It looked awesome, too bad I didn't get to eat any of it. http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/frown.gif<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
What this what you had in mind, Nghtcrwlr?Because it was what I had! But I saw it in motion, as a movie... Oh boy, you should have seen Wolvie jump at Nighty like that! Definitely one of my favorite flashes in front of my eyes.
LMAO!
NARF!
http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/biggrin.gif
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===={::??@m??::}====
~Award-winning designer of Norway's lovely crinkly edges.~
[LMAO!!! You rule gnahrf!!...Ha! And you said you weren't good writing in english! You were kidding right?!...Oh, and don't worry, it fits perfect in the "tale," although as far as I know, it is an improvisory thing that not even I know were it's gonna end up going. Oh, yeah, and I've got a lil' tidbit here that just occurred to me. I'm not sure if it is accurate, or true, or whatever, but I read about this somewhere, and it may just do...]
NC: Uhm, who's there?
(Mystique comes in, hair messed up and dress wrinkled and muddy, dragging a young girl by the hand)
Mystique: I've had it! How am I supposed to carry a successful career as a supervillain in these conditions?! (*I'm gonna have a long talk with my manager*) This is what happens when you hook up with someone while still building your career...
NC: What's going on?
Mystique: HERE! YOU BABYSIT!! (puts girl's hand in his, still smeared in whipped cream http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/wink.gif ) ... Skip the family reunion this time. Be productive for once and just babysit while I go take over the world! (stomps off)
NC: Uhm, ok, (to girl) guten tag, Fraulein! whoever you are. Guess we're gonna get to know each other, huh? ...By the way, what did she mean by "family reunion"?
Girl: Oh, don't worry, I'll explain: Hello, I'm your sister Gloria. That's my mommy too. (pointing towards retreating Mystique)
NC: Really? (*sheez, another one!*)...And, uhm, who might your daddy be?
Gloria: Well, it was almost the plumber, but he turned out to be the one that got away...so *ahem* my daddy is a Senator...
NC: Ooooh ... he's a POLITICIAN?! ...Oh, man! I can't believe 'mother' was capable of actually lowering herself! She should've stuck with the plumber...Ach! I mean, uh, I mean --
Gloria (not noticing NC's late realization, looking up at the sky, completely composed and with a tired look on her face): Yeah, I know.
[ok, please don't kill me for wrecking anything, I actually don't know much about this story or how it stands right now...I'm just shooting here...really badly]
LMAO!!! This is sooo WRONG!!! .I cant stop laughing!
Pandora
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mwuahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
cant breath *gasp*
keep going, please
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give a kiss tall and dark bamfsome!!!
(NC looks at the "Uncanny Question??" thread, then angrily switches threads, only to find the "Don't know if any of you have seen this yet..." thread and sees second groupshot of Evo from comics continuum...with Wolve pumped up...)
NC(mumble/whisper, to self): Herr Looogan! You @#%#%%@$@$#%!!...
Booming voice eminating from the heavens: Kuurt...!
------------------
[I was thinking along the lines of revenge of the unsung hero...]
NC: Ok, ok, ok! (*clears his throat*)...Herr Logan, you single, hairy, Muenster&Brie-smelling, child-of-a-?, steroid-promoting, spotlight-stealing, temper-infested, never-let-the-elf-taste-cake-at-a-wedding-party-bum!
Booming Voice: Now THAT'S better...
---------
***SPOILERS, SPOILERS! If you haven't/don't want to read the "Nocturne's Powers&MOM" thread, DON'T READ AHEAD!!!****
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[From the "Nocturnes Powers&Mom?!" thread comes...]
Magneto(stomping from the aforementioned thread): KURT WAGNER!! YOU!!! So that's why you kept saying it was the mail lady?! You were trying to hide from me!... I'M GONNA TO KILL YOU!!
NC: That's another reality, that's another reality!!! I'm innocent!!
<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by nghtcrwlr:
***SPOILERS, SPOILERS! If you haven't/don't want to read the "Nocturne's Powers&MOM" thread, DON'T READ AHEAD!!!****
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[From the "Nocturnes Powers&Mom?!" thread comes...]
Magneto(stomping from the aforementioned thread): KURT WAGNER!! YOU!!! So that's why you kept saying it was the mail lady?! You were trying to hide from me!... I'M GONNA TO KILL YOU!!<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
LOL! Sehr wunderbar, nghtcrwlr.
L M A O nghtcrwlr!!!
http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/smile.gif http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/smile.gif http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/smile.gif http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/smile.gif http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/smile.gif http://www.hostboard.com/ubb/smile.gif
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give a kiss tall and dark bamfsome!!!