True Friendship....

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October 13th, 2004, 02:02 PM
Peter Peeker

Are you tired of all those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound
good, but never actually come close to reality?

Well, here is a series of promises that really speaks to true friendship:

1. When you are sad - I will help get you drunk and plot revenge against
the sorry bastard who made you sad.

2. When you are blue - I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile - I will know you finally got laid.

4. When you are scared - I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried - I will tell you horrible stories about how
much worse it could be and to quit whining.

6. When you are confused - I will use little words.

7. When you are sick - Stay the hell away from me until you are well
again. I don't want whatever you have.

8. When you fall - I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

This is my oath...I pledge it till the end. Why?, you may ask. Because
you are my friend!!

Remember: A good friend will help you move. A really good friend will
help you move a body.

Let me know if I ever need to bring a shovel.
October 13th, 2004, 02:08 PM
Drau

"Mawwage. Mawwage is what bwings us togethah today. Mawwage, that bwessed awwangement, that dweam wiffin a dweam and wove, twue wove wiww fowwow you fowevah so tweasuwe youw wove."
October 13th, 2004, 02:09 PM
-megalithanod

I always liked the motto...

"A friend would bail you out of jail.

A TRUE friend would be in there with you!"
October 13th, 2004, 02:09 PM
Darkest Angel

You forgot a couple...

-a true friend will hold your hair up when you are puking.

-a true friend will pop that thing on the back of your neck for you.

-a true friend will go out with a hot chick's fugly cousin/sister/best friend.

-a true friend will never speak about your "secret" fetishes.
October 13th, 2004, 02:15 PM
Tr3s

A true friend will lop off your head when you can't endure the pain of hara-kiri.
October 13th, 2004, 02:17 PM
Moviemaniac4

Right now I will REALLY like to Smile
October 13th, 2004, 02:18 PM
Darkest Angel

Quote:

Originally posted by Tr3s:
A true friend will lop off your head when you can't endure the pain of hara-kiri.

I true friend will spear you in the gut to secure your entrance into Valhalla.

[img]graemlins/grrr.gif[/img]
October 13th, 2004, 05:32 PM
Tr3s

don't forget the spear up his rectum...for good measure, to ensure his..um... smooth passage. :>
October 13th, 2004, 05:50 PM
Andyman

Quote:

Originally posted by Tr3s:
don't forget the spear up his rectum...for good measure, to ensure his..um... smooth passage. :>

That's enough from the peanut gallery! [img]graemlins/grrr.gif[/img]
October 13th, 2004, 06:00 PM
Darkest Angel

Good idea, Tres. *Dips spear tip in crisco* [img]wink.gif[/img]
October 13th, 2004, 06:04 PM
Andyman

Quote:

Originally posted by -Dark Angel-:
Good idea, Tres. *Dips spear tip in crisco* [img]wink.gif[/img]

Lube? What's the occasion? My birthday is not for a while yet.
October 13th, 2004, 06:07 PM
Tr3s

Quote:

Originally posted by Andyman:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Tr3s:
don't forget the spear up his rectum...for good measure, to ensure his..um... smooth passage. :>

That's enough from the peanut gallery! [img]graemlins/grrr.gif[/img] <hr /></blockquote>*throws stale peanuts at Andymon.

c'mon, put up a fight, girlie-man. :0
October 13th, 2004, 06:13 PM
Andyman

Quote:

Originally posted by Tr3s:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Andyman:
<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Tr3s:
don't forget the spear up his rectum...for good measure, to ensure his..um... smooth passage. :>

That's enough from the peanut gallery! [img]graemlins/grrr.gif[/img] <hr /></blockquote>*throws stale peanuts at Andymon.

c'mon, put up a fight, girlie-man. :0<hr /></blockquote>Sticks and stones and stale peanuts may break my bones but names...*sniff*...JUST STOP CALLING ME NAMES!!!

*runs crying to the bathroom*
October 13th, 2004, 06:15 PM
Darkest Angel

...aw, great. He's gonna be in there for hours. Good job, Tres. -_-

*heads out back to take a leak*

[img]wink.gif[/img]
October 13th, 2004, 06:18 PM
Moviemaniac4

Guys, I am starting to worry about you..... [img]eek.gif[/img]
October 13th, 2004, 06:23 PM
Andyman

Quote:

Originally posted by MM4:
Guys, I am starting to worry about you..... [img]eek.gif[/img]

True friends worry about their true friends! Thanks MM4! *sniff*
October 13th, 2004, 06:25 PM
Darkest Angel

*returns from leak-taking out back* Damn...you guys shoulda told me there was a convent on the adjoining property...I think I just caused a rash of vow-breaking... [img]wink.gif[/img]
October 13th, 2004, 06:34 PM
Peter Peeker

well, I'm sure it was a rash of some kind....

YOWZA! [img]biggrin.gif[/img]
October 13th, 2004, 06:45 PM
Andyman

Quote:

Originally posted by -Dark Angel-:
*returns from leak-taking out back* Damn...you guys shoulda told me there was a convent on the adjoining property...I think I just caused a rash of vow-breaking... [img]wink.gif[/img]

Hmmm....I was out there earlier and I saw none. [img]wink.gif[/img]
October 13th, 2004, 06:45 PM
Darkest Angel

OH NOES!!! Peeker's gonna get all kinds of hurt! [img]graemlins/grrr.gif[/img]

[img]wink.gif[/img]
October 13th, 2004, 06:47 PM
Darkest Angel

...don't make me get DA the Second in here to tag team your ass, Fluff... [img]graemlins/grrr.gif[/img]
October 13th, 2004, 06:50 PM
Moviemaniac4

Hummm....ok.....hummmm.....you are my friends too, just don't touch me or that...specially THAT !!!! [img]eek.gif[/img]
October 13th, 2004, 07:44 PM
bonedust

a true friend never betrays....yet all humans will betray.

befriend the dead.
October 13th, 2004, 07:56 PM
Darkest Angel

Quote:

Originally posted by bonedust:
a true friend never betrays....yet all humans will betray.

befriend the dead.

See, that's the thing...I make no promises, yet people--particularly women--want them. Don't they understand that if I swear to nothing, I can never truly hurt them?
October 13th, 2004, 08:11 PM
bonedust

im gonna pretend like u didnt try to apply logic to women.

im disappointed in you....
October 13th, 2004, 08:59 PM
Darkest Angel

...yer right...I got kinda crazy there...woozy...you know, I can't drink at work, so... [img]wink.gif[/img]
October 13th, 2004, 09:12 PM
Quikman

a true friend aint gay jsut cause he give you head [img]wink.gif[/img]
October 13th, 2004, 09:47 PM
bonedust

Quote:

Originally posted by Q-Man Sub Zero's apprentice:
a true friend aint gay jsut cause he give you head [img]wink.gif[/img]

...maybe in sweden...
October 14th, 2004, 03:32 AM
Andyman

With true friends like you guys...who needs enemas?
October 14th, 2004, 03:39 AM
Darkest Angel

...sounds like Fluff wants to go to Valhalla! [img]graemlins/grrr.gif[/img]