just for laughs

[Shiva]

Hey all I just noticed we have never had a JOKE thread!! So this will be it!

Came to mind when I ran across one I just wanted to tell Juju and everyone else [img]tongue.gif[/img] sounds so familiar with pets lol, funny


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Our young daughter had adopted a stray cat. To my distress, he began to use the back of our new sofa as a scratching post. "Don't worry," my husband reassured me. "I'll have him trained in no time."
I watched for several days as my husband patiently "trained" our new pet. Whenever the cat scratched, my husband deposited him outdoors to teach him a lesson.

The cat learned quickly. For the next 16 years, whenever he wanted to go outside, he scratched the back of the sofa.

[OneCatLover]

[img]graemlins/idea.gif[/img] Great idea, Maria!!! Loved the joke!! Teehehehe!! Sounds like something Tim would do!! LMAO!!! I get lots of funny jokes in e-mail, but I can't think of how the blonde one goes!! I'll have to check it again so I can post it!! CRS disease!! ROFLMAO!!!!

[Shiva]

LOL! I love reading them [img]biggrin.gif[/img]

Funny to think of a car scraching the back of a sofa when it wants to go out. Whatever is possible LOL!

[OneCatLover]

[img]biggrin.gif[/img] This is one I got this morning..............

Names for generic drugs.
In pharmocology, all drugs have a generic name. Tylenol is acetaminophen, Aleve is Naproxen, Amoxcil is Amoxicillan.
U.S. Federal Drug Administration has been looking for a generic name for Viagra and announced that it has settled on Mycoxafailin.
Also considered were Mycoxafloppin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Mydixadud, and Alimpdixafixit. And of course, Ibepokin.

Bahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hahahahaha!!! Hope ya'll enjoy this as much as I did!! Good laugh to get you going!! LOL!! [img]wink.gif[/img]

[Shiva]

LMAO!!!!! I like Ibepokin [img]wink.gif[/img] hehe!
This is my favourite joke but don?t read it if you?re sensitive it?s racist [img]eek.gif[/img]
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A man was walking down the road and saw a nigger with a toad on his head coming his way.
"Where the hell did THAT come from?" asked the man.
"Well, it started as a small wart on my ass" replied the frog.

[img]confused.gif[/img]

[SEXY GRAMMA]

TWO OLD WOMEN WERE DRIVING IN A LARGE CAR, NEITHER ONE COULD BARELY SEE OVER THE DASHBOARD. THEN CAME AN INTERSECTION , THE LIGHT WAS RED BUT THEY WENT THROUGH IT. THE WOMEN IN THE PASSENGER SEAT THOUGHT TO HER SELF, I MUST BE LOSING IT, I COULD OF SWORN SHE WENT THROUGH THE RED LIGHT. THEN CAME ANOTHER INTERSECTION AND AGAIN, THEY WENT RIGHT THROUGH. THIS TIME THE WOMEN THOUGHT FOR SURE SHE WAS LOSING IT AND DECIDED SHE WAS GOING TO PAY VERY CLOSE ATTENTION TO THE ROAD! SURE ENOUGH AT THE NEXT RED LIGHT, THEY WENT THROUGH IT! SHE TURNED TO THE OTHER WOMEN AND SAID, MILDRED DID YOU KNOW WE WENT THROUGH THREE RED LIGHTS! YOU COULD OF KILLED US! MILDRED TURNED TO HER AND SAID, SHIT! AM I DRIVING!?

[LadyLove]

Heyyyyyyyyyyyy.........good idea for a thread! And I loved all the jokes........now I gotta find a couple I got recently.....forgot where I put 'em [img]frown.gif[/img]

[arkon]

<marquee> An earth redneck called the local sherrif and said, "you'd better come out here, Leroy. I just found two hippies on my propitty and had to take care of 'em." "Whatta ya mean ya had to take care of 'em, Earl? Where are they now?" "Well, I buried 'em!" replied Earl. "You buried 'em?!", the Sherrif exclaimed. "Ya mean they was dead?" Earl replied, "well, they said they wasn't, but you know how them hippies lie." </marquee>

[Aahz]

A grandfather and his Garndson were fishing one day. The Older man took out a whiskey flask and had a wee nip. The boys seeing this asks, " Grampa can I have a sip of your whiskey?"
Grampa replies " Well boy does your pecker reach your arsehole?"
"No Grampa it does not"
"Then ya cant have any of me whiskey lad"
A little while later Gramps was having a smoke and the boy asked " Grampa can I have a wee bit of your smoke?"
"Well laddy does your pecker reach your arsehole?"
"No grampa I told you it does not."
"Then ya cant ahve any of me smoke lad"
A little while later at the bait shop Grandpa is feeling guilty so he buys the boy a scratch off ticket and a coke. Back in the boat headed out the boy scratches his ticket and exclaims "GRAMPA GRAMPA IW ON TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS !!!"
"Aye thats a fine lad then, ya goin to share with your fishing buddy your grampa?"
"Well Grampa does your pecker reach your arsehole?"
"Aye lad" he says proudly." It does"
The lad says
"Well then you can go and fuck yourself" putting the ticket in his pocket.

hehehe

GBYA

Aahz

<font color="#a62a2a" size="1">[ August 06, 2002 08:04 PM: Message edited by: Aahz ]</font>

[SEXY GRAMMA]

BAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! AAHZ, THAT WAS TOO FUNNY!!!!!!

[img]biggrin.gif[/img]