JOTD

[BlueWahooChambordDevil]

dr says congrats tim, your wife had triplets. tim says im not surprised, ive got a cock like a chimney. dr says well you need to have it cleaned because your kids all came out black

[plantsman]

Worse joke I've heard.

[imported_drgnfly3030]

Here's a better stupid joke:


Why don't you ever hear rabbits having sex??



Cottonballs. [img]/LDPforum/ubbthreads/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/grin.gif[/img]

[1inStripes]

>>>> A teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students. 'Human Beings are the only animals that stutter', she says. A little girl raises her hand. 'I had a kitty-cat who stuttered', She volunteered. The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could Become, asked the girl to describe the incident. 'Well', she began, 'I was in the back yard with my kitty and the Rottweiler that lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, He jumped over the fence into our yard!' 'That must've been scary', said the teacher. 'It sure was', said the little girl. 'My kitty raised his back,went 'Sssss, Sssss, Sssss'...And before he could say '[censored]', The Rottweiler ate him! The teacher wet her pants laughing.......

[imported_elp6n]

Each Friday night after work, Bubba would fire up his outdoor grill and cook a venison steak. But all of Bubba's neighbors were Catholic, and since it was Lent, they were forbidden from eating meat on Friday.

The delicious aroma from the grilled venison steaks was causing such a problem for the Catholic faithful that they finally talked to their priest. The Priest came to visit Bubba and suggested that he become a Catholic. After several classes and much study, Bubba attended Mass. As the priest sprinkled holy water over him, he said, 'You were born a Baptist, and raised a Baptist, but now you are a Catholic.

'Bubba's neighbors were greatly relieved, until Friday night arrived, and the wonderful aroma of grilled venison again filled the neighborhood. The Priest was called by the neighbors and as he rushed into Bubba's yard clutching a rosary preparing to scold him, he stopped and watched in amazement. There stood Bubba, clutching a small bottle of holy water which he carefully sprinkled over the grilling meat and chanting: 'You wuz born a deer, you wuz raised a deer, but now you is a catfish.'

[MikMo]

What do you call the U.S. being ran by Barack Obama?


OBAMANATION!

[R13]

There was a cucumber, a pickle, and a penis sitting around talking about how their lives sucked. The cucumber said "Man, my life sucks. When I get big, fat, and juicy, they cut me up and stick me on a salad." The pickle looks at him and says, "You think you have it bad? When I get big, fat, and
juicy, they stick me in vinegar, put spices on me, and stick me in a
jar." The penis looks at him and says, "You think you have it rough?
When I get big, fat, and juicy, they stick a rubber strap on my head,
stick me in a dark room, and bang my head against the wall until I
throw up and pass out!.