Relationships. From A Man's Point Of View

[imported_Counts]

IMHO I think another way to put it is to choose your battles if you are 100% sure she is wrong about something but it really does not matter then go with her on it that way she is alot more likly to back off on the things that really do matter to you.

It took me 3 or 4 years to figure it out but I am much happier for it now LOL

[imported_ut1]

A lot of times the opposite sex wants you to be a friend first and a lover second. Most of us guys are so sexually geared that we want just the opposite. Its hard to know what advice to give, as we are all very different creatures, so no known formula is 100%.
What has worked in my 29 years of marriage?
1. Knowing that we were both in it for the long haul...no talk of "Well, if it doesn't work out, we'll just get a divorce."
2. Knowing when to keep your mouth shut (that went for both of us).
3. Knowing what is important to fight about. Don't sweat the small stuff.
4. Women love to talk with their significant other, so if you think something's bothering her and she needs to get it out in the open, ASK HER!
5. Share in one another's dreams.
6. Have an active church life, but most importantly BECAUSE you believe! Our faith plays a huge part in our marriage.


As I said, probably won't work for everyone, but it has for us so far.

My advice to my son? "The best thing you can do in life for your children is to love their mom."

Probably some of the best advice i have heard guys.

Here is what I think, I preach this to my nephew and all kids I meet.
You do not have to have a girlfriend/boyfriend.
You do not have to get married when your 21
You do not have to have kids when you are 21.
Get your education, live life, everything else can and will wait. 6 Billion people on the earth, you are not as special as you think when it comes to a relationship.
You are only as happy or sad as you let yourself be.
Im 26 (soon to be 27) I am not married, I have graduated college and plan on furthering my education beyond that. I have had a girlfriend for 3 years, she is finishing her masters degree this fall. She is not sure she may get her PHD she may not, Im in no hurry to press her on any ideas of marriage, children or "settling" down. There is plenty of time for that, often in our area especially, the need or thought to get married and start a family to early spells a demise that cannot be avoided. The divorce rate is 50% because your entering marriage and may not be even sure marriage is what you want, let along need. Im not repyling to anyone in paticular, honestly I havent read but a couple replys on this topic, this is just how I see things in terms of relationships.

[imported_ut1]

Just be careful, because "life is what happens while you're making other plans". [img]/LDPforum/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

I guess... I have learned and realized that life happens when others are sitting wishing they had lived their life a little more.

[imported_MoonlightGraham]

great post nola, i've had 4 extremely close friends get married in the past year and they are all within 6 months of my age.

[imported_ut1]

You'll find that life happens whether you're sitting or working/playing your butt off. You plan on doing such-n-such by a certain time, but when the time comes you find either the money, the time, or the health is not available to carry through with what you wanted to do, because real life is happening around you. Time waits on no one, so grab life by the horns and run with it. Making mistakes and learning from them is half the fun of the journey.

Understood, but struggling, hardtimes, divorce etc. Im a product of. My parents married as teenagers, like 16 and 19. Divorced after 27 years. Im adament in what I tell people, wait, there is plenty of time for all if it. If its the love of your life, thats great they will still be there if it is, if its not a kid, home and alimony isnt what I want later.

[imported_ut1]

Love is a part of marriage, but commitment is the mainstay of any relationship. I understand where you're coming from, and why it is so difficult for younger folks to commit to a relationship in today's world. Since the divorce rate is the same in the church as it is in the outside world, is it any wonder that folks are skeptical about true love that lasts? My wife and I both came from loving homes with parents that were committed to their marriages. Both sets of parents have passed their 50th wedding anniversaries. So, we had good role models to follow, and have tried to do the same for our children. We'll soon see if that "took" as one is getting married in October, and another is a definite "possible" in the next year or so.