failure

[Dr. Gonzo]

as a son...
as a brother...
as a godfather...
as a lover...
as a friend...
as a poet...
as a thinker...
as a dreamer...


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[Hannibal]

Interesting...care to explain something about this? I kinda like it...

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As miserable as life may be I hold it pretty precious...

If I lose the light of the sun, I will write by candlelight, moonlight, no light. If I lose paper and ink, I wil write in blood on forgotten walls. I will write always, I will capture nights all over the world and bring them to you.
Word And Voice
Motocross Fanatics
General Philosophy

[Dr. Gonzo]

something that's so hard to speak of and/or express.....
so i guess i put it as simplistic as possible...

think it's finalized?

why do you kind of like it?

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[Hannibal]

I kinda liked it because, at first glance, i couldn't see myself liking it, but upon the reading, it was.... symbolic, to anyone, anywhere, and stood there, different, but let the reader *at least to me* feel all those things which you wrote down. And reflect that in themselves.
Finalized? I suppose so... Unless you think of something REALLY great to close with.
But, I kinda think it could use something, maybe, before each line, like...
*yada yada* as a son....
*yada yada* as a brother...
or a great closing like I previously stated might help to do it some justice.
For the poem being as naked as it is though, it's good.


------------------
As miserable as life may be I hold it pretty precious...

If I lose the light of the sun, I will write by candlelight, moonlight, no light. If I lose paper and ink, I wil write in blood on forgotten walls. I will write always, I will capture nights all over the world and bring them to you.
Word And Voice
Motocross Fanatics
General Philosophy

[Dr. Gonzo]

yeah, i wanted to originally go out with a bang...but I couldn't put my finger on it. It's hard to come by.....

I see what you are saying as far as the *yada yada* ...good point...i might try and think of something.....

maybe a reflection in a different sorts......like a compare and contrast
like...seeing this as finger points to my failure.....
then contrasting it to why I failed....
like what I turn to because of the failure...
or summin....wanna help me brainstorm?

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[Hannibal]

And how would I go about this? helping you I mean.

------------------
As miserable as life may be I hold it pretty precious...

If I lose the light of the sun, I will write by candlelight, moonlight, no light. If I lose paper and ink, I wil write in blood on forgotten walls. I will write always, I will capture nights all over the world and bring them to you.
Word And Voice
Motocross Fanatics
General Philosophy