Originally Posted by
JB57
Hi Yuri,
This battle between Sabrina and Jasmine was really good. I love how you've established how incredibly horny they are for each other, how much they hate each other, and how much their mutual lust and hatred gives them the ability to battle each other in ways that they could not with any other opponent. I look forward to whatever they do to each other once this present adventure is concluded!
I also liked the way the story ended, with the all-girl, 14 hour orgy. It would have been nice to get more about that.
In the "constructive criticism" department, there are some aspects of the story where the description of what is going on is not clear to me. In particular, they are fighting in a full bathtub, yet they don't seem to be spilling much water and, in a couple of cases, it's hard to see how both of them did not avoid being drowned by the other. What you are describing would make a bit more sense if the tub was only shallowly filled, but that is not what you seem to describe.
Great work, really looking forward to the next story and more with Sabrina and Jasmine's rivalry.
JB
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