WAR

[gnosis_within]

i am at war with satan himself!

most people know him as Anthony 'Tony' Sitz, head of the registar's office at my college. at the beginning of last semester, i had a total of 57 hours, just 3 hours short of junior status. i took an 8 week course so i could have junior status before registration for the next semester, but this asshole wouldn't let me have my hours! i went to talk to him in his office. he spoke to me like i was in first grade and said that i was stupid (not exactly that word, but i got the point). he said that it was all my fault and he would do nothing to help me. i saw this as a great injustice! i finished the class, but he wouldn't let me have the hours! now i would be forced to register with the sophomores and get screwed out of getting into the classes that i wanted.

Tony Sitz=1
Me=0

today, however, we met again, and things were different. as i was walking out of the library, i saw the man himself walking with a box full of copy paper in his hands. it was obviously heavy; he seemed to be having a hard time holding it. he was walking east, and i was headed south. i had to move fast to make sure that we would cross paths at the same time. as i crossed in front of him, i slowed down to a snail's pace, forcing him to stop! after seeing that he had to stop, i started walking at normal speed again. i did not look at him, nor did i say excuse me. man, revenge is sweet!

Tony Sitz=1
Me=1

it's all tied up right now, but i assure you, my faithful readers, that Tony Sitz will not defeat me! the semester is young, and i have no doubt that me and Tony will run into each other again.

[SHATOUSHKA]

i believe you have misjudged, dear gnosis...

curtis sanders is the devil.



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~~share some greased tea with me~~
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[ek3]

hehe...that's a funny story gnosis...I can't wait for the next installment.

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[This message has been edited by ek3 (edited November 28, 2001).]

[gnosis_within]

your wait is over, ek3!

last night, i was at work (i am a waiter at a local dining establishment for those of you who do not know). it was still early in the evening, so we were not too busy. i was standing around talking to some co-workers when i saw the king of all assholes, along with his wife, being led to a table by a hostess. i thought, 'man, i hope he sits in my section!' the fates smiled upon me that evening, my faithful readers, for he was seated at table 66 (if we had a table 666, i am sure he would have been seated there, but 66 is as close as he could get) which was in my section.

i walked up to his table and said 'hello, my name' then was interrupted by the sound of his vile bitch of a wife's voice saying 'i'll have water.' followed by a request for tea from dickhead. stunned, i simply knodded my head and turned to get their drinks and re-gain my composure, but was stopped by the bitch, asking me if our spinach dip was good. all i could muster at the time was 'yes, it is.' she asked tony if he would like some, and he said 'i dont care, get what you want.' then she started in with the 'well, i'm only going to get it if you are going to eat some.' i was starting to sweat, they had me on the ropes, the situation was out of my control. i just stood there with a blank look on my face, wishing they would make a decision, so i could get the hell out of there and catch my breath. they finally decided to get the spinach dip. i hurried up to a computer to put their order in and steady myself. i knew that i couldn't blow this opportunity.

as i was making their drinks, i composed myself, and decided that i would be extremely nice to them. do not fear, there was a method to my madness. when i had filled their glasses, i turned to a fellow waiter and said, 'hey, do you see the guy at 66? he is the biggest asshole i have ever met.' i gave them their drinks and took their order, i was nice, but never made eye contact with tony. after taking their order (which was krunchy shrimp if anyone is interested), i went around telling every other server that he was an asshole. they all asked who he was and why i said that. i told them his name, occupation, and briefly described the way i had been treated by him. i went up to the kitchen guys, and said, 'if there are any shrimp that have been dropped on the floor, be sure to put them on his plate.' they just laughed and said they would if they could find some; i never found out if they did anything to his food. but what i do know is this: i told at least 15 people about that mother fucker. that means that 15 people will instantly think 'asshole' everytime they see him. not only that, but they will tell the people they are with about him.

if my plan works accordingly, everyone i told will tell at least one person, and those people will tell at least one person, and so on, until the entire town knows! hopefully, he will be shunned everywhere he goes and will be forced to move somewhere else.....or driven to suicide, you know, whatever.

Tony Sitz=1
Me=2

[SHATOUSHKA]

and i was actually expecting something to come
out of that story... what a waste! [img]confused.gif[/img]

[Tard]

Ya didn't even sneeze a goober into his shrimp sauce?!?
Pox on you!

[Beta-Decay]

Find out what car he drives. Put vaseline on his windshield wipers, so it cannot be seen, but enough that it will smear when he turns the wipers on.

[SHATOUSHKA]

tee hee.... that's actually funny to invision... [img]redface.gif[/img]

[Beta-Decay]

Super glue work even better, make sure you do not get fingerprints on there though.

[Hannibal]

Why don't you put butter on the door to his office?
or, poop in a bag, go into his office, put it slyly on the floor like your gonna talk to him, shoot the shit.. while you're shooting the shit *pun intended* slowly move the bag *with your foot* under his desk to the corner where he won't kick it over, but where it's unnoticable... think of the stench!
ANd, if you see him carrying shit again, meet up in front of him like you did, then turn quickly *away from him* making your bookbag smack into whatever he's holding, knocking it from his hands all over the ground, then just walk off like you had forgotten something from where you just came!
or, you could just punch the mother fucker in the face, spit in his eye, and walk out.